Old Demon and the Sea Witch (Welcome to Hell #9) - Eve Langlais Page 0,31

the least bit concerned? Dottie is your minion.”

“Who can handle herself without my help. I wouldn’t dare offer.” Lucifer shook his head.

“I’d usually agree, but I don’t know if she can defend herself. They put some kind of pearl necklace on her.”

“Really? I didn’t take her for the kinky type.” Lucifer’s gaze brightened.

I snapped. “Not that kind of necklace. A real one. With giant pearls.”

“Still kinky. You obviously don’t know how they’re made. Neptune has a fine gig going with those suckers. Mine is only fit to burn.” The devil glanced down at his groin with a moue of annoyance.

“What does the necklace do?” I asked since the devil had veered off track.

“Those are known as Ursula’s pearls. The strand was specially made eons ago to control sea witches. It stifles their power. Makes them malleable to the commands of the one who controls the matching ring.”

“Oh, Dottie won’t like that,” I muttered.

“I daresay it’s the king who won’t like the result. Thinking he can pearl a witch of mine. I shall have to ensure a good seat to watch on the morrow. The showdown will be delicious.”

“Or you could help me get to the island early, perform some daring rescue in your name, and show this king he shouldn’t mess with minions serving Hell.” My words got a little loud at the end.

The baby stirred.

Lucifer froze. I held my breath.

“Gngngn.” The baby continued to snore.

Lucifer relaxed and said in a hushed tone, “I will not indulge your patriarchal fantasy of riding to a little woman’s rescue.”

I blinked at him. “What the fuck did you just say?”

A grin pulled at the devil’s lips. “Just quoting some of the new shit coming out of my lawyer’s office. Part of the non-bias based on everything rule. I’m thinking of incorporating it more widely. I mean, there’s so many applications for it. Think of the number of potential hero types we could decimate by recognizing that everyone is strong and can save themselves.”

“Sometimes, people need to be rescued.” In Dottie’s case, it had nothing to do with her strength or her abilities. The right thing to do involved action, not standing by and watching.

The baby grumbled and squirmed. Lucifer glared at me and mouthed, “You are dead if he wakes.”

The baby settled, and I was the one to breathe in relief.

“Are you sure this isn’t sour grapes that Dorothy is apparently doing a better job of sussing out interesting things than you are? She makes a much better minion,” Lucifer declared.

“I thought Dorothy being kidnapped by the king of Atlantis was interesting.”

“Not really. King Rex.” The devil sneered. “He thinks he’s such a big shot. Have you seen the size of his cock? The term baby finger comes to mind.”

I winced. “Ouch.” But reassuring. Dorothy would probably laugh if he came after her with his teenie winkie. “Why would he go through so much trouble to steal a sea witch?”

“Why does anyone want them? Disagreeable lot. They have potty mouths. Attitude. And tempers. Is it any wonder they’re among my favorites?” Lucifer muttered, his expression soft with fondness.

“I’m pretty sure the king didn’t steal Dorothy for her cussing abilities.”

“No, more like her spell-making ones. She is the most proficient sea witch currently alive. Even her sister can’t hold a candle to her.”

“Rex thinks he can use her.” Again, something Dottie wouldn’t like.

“The man—fish?—has been living on the bottom of the ocean too long. He really hasn’t the slightest clue how things work. I blame the inbreeding. Your mother shouldn’t also be your sister and your aunt. His great-grandfather really couldn’t keep track.”

Off topic again, I reeled Lucifer back. “Are you or are you not going to help me? Because if you’re just going to run your mouth, then you can leave.” Frustration over Dottie had me lashing out at the devil. And I really didn’t care.

The baby opened a sleepy lid and peeked at me.

The devil didn’t notice, and the baby closed his eye again.

“Chill out, dude.” Lucifer did a horrible impression of a surfer dude, and the baby burp-smiled in its sleep. The devil gazed at him with something akin to affection. “Such a pity everything keeps saying he has to die.”

I blinked. “You’re planning to kill your son?”

“Not yet. There’s no challenge when they’re this small. But in a few decades, when he comes after me, I won’t have a choice.”

“What makes you think he will?”

Lucifer softly quoted. “’For the child shall inherit the kingdom of the father, sit upon the