on the couch and drag my phone out of my pocket. I stab the screen with a shaky hand, calling the one person in the world who can fix this. It’s a video call. I need to see her face.
When Alice answers, I spew out everything that Winona just told me, barely pausing for breath.
“Can you fucking believe she said that about our father?”
Alice shakes her head, her tan face turning a sickly color. “I should have told you,” she whispers.
“What the hell?” My blood turns to ice. “Are you saying it’s true?”
“Yes, it’s true. They were both in on it. They hired that particular CFO on purpose, then let him take the fall when everything came to light. Dad had a gambling problem, and he blew tons of money on his mistresses. Yes, multiple. That’s why Mother followed him everywhere when he wasn’t at work. It wasn’t love; it was justifiable paranoia. Uncle Bill had similar habits, and he was also a coke addict at the time. The day of the accident, I heard Dad arguing with him on the phone. Yelling. Maybe an hour before he left the house.”
“What did you hear our father say?” I barely recognize my voice, it’s coming from so very far away. The room is swimming. Xena groans in sympathy and paws my leg. I reach down and stroke her head in reassurance.
“Dad told Uncle Bill that if he didn’t start coughing up a lot more of his own money, he was going to expose him and let everything go to hell. Uncle Bill said something about how it would ruin all of us, and Dad said, ‘Screw my family, I don’t care anymore.’ Then he stomped off to the rec room and drank. I mean, he drank more. He was already halfway wasted. He was drunk when he was yelling at you about the dog, he was drunk when he left the house. That’s why he crashed.”
“Bullshit! That would have been all over the news.”
She shakes her head. “Uncle Bill managed to smooth it over. Not for our sake. He did it because the company was just starting to recover from the financial scandal.”
“You’re lying,” I say desperately.
She just looks at me with the same pitying expression that Winona had earlier.
“If you knew that, why didn’t you turn Uncle Bill in?” I demand. “Were you…were you just trying to protect the company?”
She snorts in contempt. “No, I was trying to protect you. Part of it was that I didn’t want to ruin your image of our father. You were already heartbroken by his death, and you worshipped Dad blindly.”
“It wasn’t blind!” I’m shouting now. Wanting to drown out the truth. “You know what, fucking lie all you want to yourself, but don’t lie to me like this. Just because you had a lousy relationship with Mom and Dad, just because you never appreciated all the sacrifices they made for us, doesn’t give you the right to make up this crap.”
“And you wonder why I never told you?” Her eyes blaze with hurt and anger. “You know what? Dad and Granddad’s pictures are on the far right side of the attic, turned towards the wall, behind a trunk full of Christmas ornaments. Go fetch them and put them back up on that altar of ancestor worship you like to pray to.” And she hangs up.
I’m cursing at my sister, just like I cursed at Winona. Shame tears at my heart, shredding it like wet paper. I don’t bully women. I don’t swear at the people I love.
I call her back, praying she’ll pick up. It goes to voicemail.
I count to thirty, then call again. I can’t lose her too. I’ve lost Winona – no, I’ve destroyed Winona, and I’ve lost my father – the father I thought I knew.
She answers, her eyes red and watery, her faced flushed with emotion. Steve’s standing next to her, and his bland, pleasant face is ablaze with fury.
“Watch how you talk to my wife if you want anything to do with our family ever again,” he snaps. “And fucking apologize for what you just said.”
I have never heard him curse, not in the ten years they’ve been married. Steve is the most mild-mannered man I’ve ever met. Up until right now.
“I’m sorry,” I say wretchedly. “You’re right. It was unforgiveable for me to speak to you that way, and it won’t happen again. Go on with what you were telling me, Alice. I need to know.”