bothered her. Being restrained or trapped had always bothered her, even more so after her time contained on the gen ship. But sitting with Nokx... It felt different. Comfortable and comforting.
Even if the male’s thighs were like steel under her ass.
Her head rested on his shoulder; she breathed in the slightly metallic scent of his scales and an earthier masculine musk clinging to his robes. His hearts beat steadily, thumping in her ears, and he periodically squeezed her or rubbed her back or touched her arm. EJ couldn’t remember from her studies whether the Xaravians were typically so touchy-feely, although it didn’t seem likely for a warrior race. Which meant something else entirely was going on.
EJ closed her eyes and sighed. She needed to get her head on straight and figure out what her plan was going to be when Faros tried to put her back on the Hollbrd. She couldn’t waste mental space on deciphering whether Nokx was being a broody male or if he wanted something else from her. And she definitely couldn’t think about ripping off his clothes and having her way with him. That was absolutely out of the question.
And yet...
She smoothed the front of his robes where they bunched up in her hands, and left her palm resting against where his hearts thumped. He tensed and she held her breath. Maybe she wasn’t brave enough to just proposition him. Her nerves had almost failed her the first time, but at least then she’d thought she stood a chance of hiding in the room with the broken door.
“Do you require more food?” he asked finally, his deep voice vibrating through his chest and into her palm.
She had spicy meat and fermented cabbage practically coming out her nose, but she’d learned never to turn down free food. “Do Xaravians eat dessert?”
He huffed what could have been a laugh, then picked up the ordering panel once more. “No, but there are two females on this ship who required the reprogramming of the mess to ensure they have dessert. I am told chocolate is acceptable?”
“Boy is it,” she said, biting the inside of her cheek. Einstein’s constant, she hadn’t had chocolate—or a fair approximation—in ages. Since leaving the Fleet, truly.
Nokx chuckled and finished ordering, then rested his chin on top of her head as they waited for the system to deliver. It seemed absentminded, like he didn’t realize he did it, just as his fingers stroked her side over and over again. EJ should have minded, but in reality it was the closest she’d had to a hug in... well, in longer than she’d had chocolate. At least if they dumped her back on the Hollbrd, she could remember Nokx’s half-embrace as a bright spot in the darkness of the previous years.
When the table finally disgorged a plate with some kind of chocolate cake, EJ reached for it but Nokx got there first. He carefully put her on her feet before standing, and kept the plate in one hand before capturing her shoulder with the other. “Not here. The rest of the crew should eat, and they will not do so while you are here.”
Which she damn well knew wasn’t true, even if she appreciated being able to eat her dinner without being stared at. “I think you mean they won’t eat while you’re here.”
He slid her a sideways look as he led the way out of the mess hall and through the corridors. “They eat with me all the time. You’re the anomaly.”
“I’m not the anomaly that growled at them and made awful faces every time they looked in my direction,” EJ said. She rolled her eyes but stayed on the lookout for any landmarks that could help her navigate the ship if she found an opportunity to escape.
Although with the degree of Nokx’s attention, escape seemed less and less likely with every passing moment.
“I didn’t growl.”
“You did so,” EJ said. She puffed up her chest and did her best impression of a scowly Xaravian to make faces at him and bare her teeth, harrumphing and grumbling. “This is exactly what you did.”
Nokx meandered to a halt to look at her, a mix of consternation and amusement on his otherwise impassive face. His scales flared with blue and hints of violet. Her cheeks heated under his scrutiny. Mocking one of only two allies on the ship probably wasn’t a great survival strategy.
“You do that well,” he said in a mild tone, then started walking once more. He didn’t