“I’ve got you,” Kevin said, his lips close to her ear, saving her for the second time that day. “I’ve got you.”
I’VE GOT TO TALK TO MY DAD.
Intellectually, Persey knew that the voice inside her head was 100 percent right. It had been years since Persey had had a conversation with her father that hadn’t ended (hell, began) badly. Even innocuous topics like the weather or the traffic coming home from work turned somehow into a scathing commentary.
Rain in the forecast? Better not use that as an excuse for staying home from school.
Traffic? Took me an extra hour to get home, so I spent that time on the phone with the headmaster trying to convince him not to kick you out of school.
Meat loaf for dinner? I should start charging you for these meals. You’re clearly too used to freeloading.
Persey did actually remember the last kind, loving conversation she had with her dad. She was in the sixth grade and had just experienced the most embarrassing moment of her young life when she managed to get her period for the first time in gym class, bleeding through her gray cotton gym shorts with such ferocity that it looked like she’d just slaughtered a chicken in the locker room.
The mortification had been enhanced by the fact that one of the boys—a fiendish little prepubescent piece of shit named Cosimo with bad teeth and a monobrow who loved nothing more than to point out everyone else’s weaknesses in some kind of subconscious effort to distract people from his own—was the first person to see her. If it had been one of the girls, there might have been a moment of empathy while they hurried her back into the locker room to find a tampon and a change of clothes, but no. She got Cosimo. Who promptly pointed out the growing spot of red on the back of her pants and yelled as loud as he could that Persey was a vampire who peed blood.
By the time the driver got Persey home, she was in tears. Her mom had gone to bed with one of her migraines, but her dad was in the kitchen.
“What happened?” he asked the moment he saw her. She clutched a clear plastic bag with her soiled gym clothes and waddled into the kitchen, the enormous old-fashioned maxipad between her legs making it difficult to walk.
“I…” She sniffled. Should she tell him? “I just…”
His eyes drifted to the bag, and she saw understanding wash over his face. “I see.”
She’d been half hoping he wouldn’t say anything—sympathy and comfort weren’t really her dad’s strong suits—and just let her retreat to her room in silent mortification, but instead, her dad sat down on one of the barstools next to the kitchen counter and folded his hands in his lap.
“I’m so sorry this happened while your mom is, um, indisposed, but I just want you to know that this is totally normal and it happens to all girls at some point in their lives, and one day, you’ll be able to look back on this and laugh. I promise.”
It hadn’t exactly been a hug and a shoulder to cry on, but there had been a gentleness about her dad at that moment, something she’d rarely seen before and never since, and his little speech soothed her. Calmed her. And she never did talk to her mom about it.
Persey almost wished she could forget that episode, even though it was one of the few nice memories she had of her father. Somehow, recalling that moment was like salt in the wound of their relationship, and every time she thought of it, her entire body would clench up, preparing for the pain she knew was coming.
Unfortunately, it was this very memory, combined with the conversation she’d had the week before with her brother, that gave her even the smallest bit of hope that she would be able to talk to him. To make him understand that going to college would be a waste of money, and lay out the plan she’d come up with instead: the Peace Corps. She’d be able to help people who needed it, see more of the world than the upper-class community she was raised in, and gain skills that would help her in whatever career came next. See, Dad? I’m not freeloading. I have a plan!
She just needed her parents’ support for the two years of her service, and then they could be done with her if that’s