No Duke Will Do - Eva Devon Page 0,21
groaned. He prayed to God that was not the story she was creating in her beautiful and very intelligent head. “Because it will do you no good,” he countered. “I am not the romantic hero.”
“I say you are,” she stated.
He blew out a sigh. “If it pleases you to think so, I shan’t stop you, but do not make me the hero of your story.”
“Heath,” she began. “You must give up this pretense.”
“What pretense?” he demanded as he placed the cups on the table, ready to pour.
“That there is nothing between us,” she stated. “That this is entirely some sort of philanthropic endeavor upon your part. You desire to be with me.”
He ground his teeth, gripping the delicate china with more force than was wise.
Was he so easy to read? Most could not. But she? Apparently, he was a bloody open book.
He’d brought her here, determined nothing should arise between them, determined he should only be her strength.
She stood slowly and crossed to him. “Why are you afraid of me?” she asked.
“I am not afraid of you,” he growled.
“You are,” she said. “You are desperately afraid of me. You are afraid that we should be close. You are afraid to kiss me.”
“I’ve kissed you once,” he bit out, pouring the tea rather recklessly.
“Then, kiss me again,” she said. “We shall both enjoy it, and I find I want it very much.”
He dumped lumps of sugar into the tea, desperate to distract himself from the heat firing through him and converging on his cock. “Oi did not bring ye here to—”
“I know you did not bring me here to be intimate with me, but. . . I find. . . I find, I wish it,” she rushed. “It must sound mad, but I want to be free of society and its rules and its strictures—”
“Mary,” he said, stunned by her boldness, terrified that he wanted it too.
She shook her head and rushed on. “Now, I know we barely know each other, but perhaps that is the most wonderful thing. We can be with each other without the condemnation or assumptions of society. You can see me, and I can see you as we truly are.”
He frowned, his heart tightening. “You can never truly see me.”
“Allow me to try,” she countered.
He abandoned the tea cups and crossed to her.
“You want me to kiss you?”
She nodded.
Was this how she would draw her strength, by becoming an independent woman? And he realized, yes, that was exactly what she wanted to be: an independent woman, who could do as she chose and pick who she chose. Even if that meant taking a lover.
She was choosing him. No one was choosing for her. And he understood her in a way that sent the room swinging around him.
She was so young, but she was no innocent.
It would be a lie to himself to say she was. He knew she’d seen darkness, and she was reaching out to him. It would be cruel of him to tell her she was a fool, that she should not do as she wished.
It would be an insult to her intelligence, to her will, to her independence.
And so, he gave in at that moment.
After all, he was not one to be stopped by fear, and she was right. He was afraid of her, of being close to a woman like her. For, she was not here for a bit of rough.
No, she was here to change her life.
So, he held his hand out to her again.
She took it without question. “Teach me,” she breathed. “Teach me to be free.”
“You think I can give you freedom through a kiss?”
“I think it’s a beginning.”
Carefully, he slipped his hand to her lower back and pulled her closer towards him. The feel of her again was beyond anything he’d ever imagined. It was like looking upon some fresh dawn, and he realized he wanted that. He wanted her hope. He wanted her brand new beginning just as much as she did. With more gentleness than he’d ever employed, he tilted her head back.
He gazed upon her face.
Was he worthy of her? Of this?
He knew the answer to that.
He’d never be truly worthy of having her, but he could have this with her.
If this is what she truly wanted, who was he to say no?
Oh, some might say he should pull back and be the gentleman, but he was not a gentleman. And he was also no fool. It was not his right to tell her how