No Commitment (Capital Kingsmen #1) - Lisa Suzanne Page 0,8

a tour around the world...or so Tommy has reminded me over and over again.

When I finally got out of the house on that reality show, the guys were already in Europe waiting for me. I didn’t even have a chance to show up at Dani’s door to try to convince her to just hold on for me. I didn’t even know how to tell her to hold on for two more years for me.

And now we’re almost at the end. Glasgow in two nights, and in three nights, our final show at Wembley again. After that, we can move out of the house we rented for the last two years here in London to fly back home.

Then it’s back to cheeseburgers and pizza instead of Yorkshire pudding and shepherd’s pie. Miller Lite instead of Guinness. One hundred twenty volts of power instead of two hundred thirty. And, of course, long, hot showers. Missing that luxury isn’t necessarily exclusive to England, though. That’s just a general complaint about life on the road as a musician.

To be perfectly clear, I didn’t choose work over her. I never had the luxury of that choice...not when I’m owned by my record label and not when I have three other men who have relied on me for longer than I can remember. But I don’t know if I want to be relied on anymore.

The more I watch Dustin as his hand inches up the jeans covering Amanda’s thigh, the more I want what they have. I want it with the girl who got away not just once, but twice.

We get out of the car and saunter up to the house. The maid sneaks us through to the backyard since this is a surprise for eighteen-year-old Coraline. We take our spots on the stage. I lift my strap over my head and let it settle on my shoulder.

No matter where I am, when I slip that strap over my head and allow myself to get lost in music, I’m in my element. I’m where I’m supposed to be. The only one I’ve ever allowed into this headspace is Danielle, and tonight’s no different.

She’s my lucky charm, the one I think of when I hit along certain basslines because she’s the one I was thinking of when I wrote them. The girls in the crowd scream as we play, and once our four songs are over, I’m ready to head toward our temporary home to call it a night.

I smile for selfies through the exhaustion. It’s not just physical anymore. It’s mental. The smile looks fake, and you’d think I’d be able to act my way through it, but I can’t. Not anymore. This tour has taken its toll on me, and I’m desperate for a break.

I’m desperate to get back home.

I’m desperate to see where things lie with Dani after all this time has passed.

“Meet me in the bathroom off the kitchen and I’ll blow you.” That would be the birthday girl murmuring softly in my ear after our selfie.

I clear my throat. I thought I’d heard it all in the last six years, but that one might take the cake. “Sorry, babe, but I’ve got a girl.”

I keep it simple. It’s not a lie. I’ve got a girl on my mind all the time, and even though I’ve gotten sucked off and jerked off and fucked off by plenty of other women on this tour, not one has numbed me enough to forget, so a barely-legal one certainly won’t.

I’m consumed by her, even after all this time, and the only way I can move forward is to find some answers.

CHAPTER 5

TYLER

The days crawl by, I’m restless at night, and the flight toward the US drags, but when the wheels touch down in Los Angeles after an eleven-hour flight, a sense of hope seems to take root in my chest. I’m back in the same country as her. Maybe I can finally find a way to make this right.

But first, sleep.

Second, a meeting with our rep at the label.

I’m all out of sorts when we do finally meet with Trevor a mere twenty-four hours after landing in LA. I tried calling Danielle, but I was sent straight to voicemail, a telltale sign that my number is still blocked. I hung up without leaving a message.

I think about borrowing Tommy’s phone to call her, but I don’t want to trick her into answering, and I don’t want to admit to Tommy what I’m doing...so I’m debating my