No Commitment (Capital Kingsmen #1) - Lisa Suzanne Page 0,70

to take in deep breaths of the ocean air. I don’t deserve to cry because it lets out the pain, and I deserve to feel the pain as sharply as I can. This was my lie, even though Ford helped me and was a part of it, and I take full responsibility for that. I just don’t know what comes next. I don’t know where we go from here or how to repair the damage I’ve caused.

I suppose I can start by giving Luna as much time as possible with Tyler while we’re in town. He texts me in the morning and asks if Luna can swim in his pool, so I pack up her swim gear and we head over after breakfast.

“Does she like the water?” he asks nervously when we walk in the door.

I nod. “She loves it.”

I change her into her swim diaper and suit and we meet Tyler out on the patio with the baby floatie I brought along. He glances up at me from his spot where he’s already in the water. He’s wearing sunglasses, so I can’t tell if he’s checking me out in my simple one-piece or if he’s checking out the floatie or the baby, but his eyes remain turned in my direction.

I move to go down the steps, and he comes over and reaches up for the baby. I hand her over, and she seems to go willingly toward him.

“Do you want the floatie?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “I just want to hold her for a little bit if that’s okay.”

“It’s fine, but be warned, she will try to dive out of your arms and into the water.”

He chuckles. “She’s stubborn.”

“Like her mama,” I murmur at the exact same time he says, “Like her mom.”

At least we can agree on that.

“Does she go under?”

“I’ve taken her to some lessons and the instructor will dunk her,” I say. “It always makes me crazy.”

“I can see why. It would make me nervous, too.” He twirls her around in the water, and she giggles. He doesn’t have any pool toys for kids out here, just a few adult-sized floats, but he seems to be doing just fine with her. He takes her over to a step with a waterfall and I hold my breath as he lets her stand on the step.

I’m always nervous near water, but I rarely let anyone aside from a certified instructor work with her in the water. I have to learn to trust him when he’s with her, though. He deserves at least that much from me.

He cages her in with his body and his arms and she walks around the step. She’s perfectly safe. He’s within arm’s reach of her at all times, but it’s still terrifying to watch.

I draw in a deep breath, and she splashes him.

“Oh no you didn’t!” he teases her, and she does it again. He laughs, and then she laughs, and it’s in that simple little exchange that I finally exhale.

And that exhalation is more than just the nerves of letting someone else be in control in the water. At least one other fear has been allayed, and that’s the fear of these two not getting along, of him not wanting to be a part of her life, of her resisting a relationship with him. I watch as she splashes him again and then he picks her up and tosses her up into the air. That’s a slight exaggeration, I guess—she’s maybe two inches above his grasp, but her giggles and his laughter are absolute music to my ears. He does it again and again and again, and she laughs and laughs and laughs.

He catches her and lowers her into his arms, and she looks up at him like he literally hung the moon in her sky. It’s a beautiful thing to witness.

He spends hours entertaining her in the water. He puts her in her floatie for a while and swims around, taking her for rides, and I sit on the step just watching the two of them. I give them their space but I’m close if either of them needs me. She’s happy in his arms, though, and he’s happy holding her, so I bask in the warm glow of the sun as I watch them get to know each other.

He seems to be blowing off band duties in favor of spending this time with her, and I don’t know if it’s to prove that’s the kind of father he is