said they wanted her dead, and the problem was that he didn’t want anyone touching a hair on her head.
“Shade?”
He cleared his throat. “Yeah, baby?”
She glanced down. When she looked back up, her lips were slightly parted, and a pretty flush colored her cheeks.
Shit. He was so fucked.
“Do you give nicknames to everyone?” she asked.
He forced a smile. “Ah, you like sugar, do you?”
Her mouth twitched. “No, actually. I don’t.”
“Princess, then?”
She shook her head. “Not really.”
“Starshine?”
She blushed again. So that one worked.
“What do you like, baby?” he asked in a voice that unintentionally dropped.
She bit her lip, looking shy and uncertain, even though he knew she could lose her inhibitions quickly and kiss like a wildcat. “The last two are all right.”
“Noted,” Shade said with enough seriousness to make her smile again.
They fell into a silence that wasn’t awkward but wasn’t exactly comfortable, either. There was too much tension between them for that—tension he was dying to release if the pressure inside him was any indication.
As they sat there on his bed in the dimly lit room, in the quiet, Shade finally truly understood what a huge problem he had. He’d already known, but yeah… Every second he spent with Tess made it a thousand times worse. It was do or die, just like she’d said. Or more like do or don’t.
He had to make a choice.
Her hand crept onto his leg. “I’m feeling a lot stronger now.” She stroked up his thigh. “Much better,” she said.
Every nerve inside him jumped to attention, and heat billowed through his chest. He wanted her more than he could remember wanting anyone. Hell, he could hardly remember anyone else at all with Tess looking at him the way she did, with that weird mix of hesitancy and up-for-anythingness on her face. She was a fucking dream, and arousal roared through his blood.
Shade grabbed her hand, stopping her increasingly bold explorations just before she hit where it would really count. He curled his fingers around hers. He knew he could be a selfish asshole sometimes, but there was no way in hell he’d sleep with a woman and then turn her over to the Dark Watch for a reward.
Tess froze, waiting. It was his move.
He hated his options. Even if he did what they both wanted and then let her fly away, she’d still be hunted by the others, and they were a bunch of vicious fucks. And if he satisfied this craving, she’d take off when her ship was done, leaving him, and then he’d be stuck facing another ten years of doing other people’s dirty work just to get back the property he’d so stupidly lost.
If he turned her in, he could buy back every single docking tower on Albion 5 and its neighbor tomorrow. He’d run this place, just like his family always had. Just like he would have all along if he hadn’t fucked up that one night.
Talk about paying for your mistakes. He was sick to death of it.
Shade lifted Tess’s hand from his thigh. It was burning a hole through his pants. “If you’re feeling better, then it’s time to get you back to your ship.”
Her face fell, and her disappointment crashed straight through him. She didn’t bother trying to hide anything from him anymore, which might have been the worst part of this whole twisted mess.
He’d been clear in his rejection, though, so she pulled it together and got off his bed. Because that was what Tess Bailey did—she dealt.
Chapter 17
It was sheer embarrassing torture, but I forced myself out onto the platform in the morning to bring Shade his usual cup of coffee. He accepted it with thanks but then barely looked at me again. He was always a little off in the mornings, so maybe he was just being his habitual cranky self. Or maybe it was the fact that I’d thrown myself at him the night before, and he’d turned me down. My stomach still dropped at the thought of that.
I climbed back on board the Endeavor without trying to make small talk with Shade, but then regretted missing our usual conversation time over coffee. He was interesting and intelligent, and he went down uncommon paths of discussion without looking horrified or making a fuss, which made talking to him one of the highlights of my day.
But not today. His rejection was still too fresh, so I hid out in the kitchen with Miko and Shiori until lunch. Together, the three of us managed