I don’t see any of me in the girl. She’s tall, sure, but Shelby ain’t tiny either. My firstborn child bosses me around like her mama too. She always wants to be picked up, so she can look at the world from up high.
Kirby never wants me feeling sad, just like her mama. If she thinks my face is unhappy, she climbs into my lap and offers me a toy or sings a song to lift my spirits. Unlike her mama, Kirby loves the woods. I’m always taking her and Caen on walks, where they give silly names to the trees and search for interesting rocks.
Caen reminds me of me, though I think he looks more like his mama. He’s big, though, and always banging into things. He’s got a goofy smile and a wild laugh. Shelby swears he’s a little version of me, but I just can’t see it.
Kirby and Caen get along well, though they split up whenever the “Magnificent Minions” get together. Dark-haired Caen and super-blond Lars will play with cars for hours. They’ve got a natural connection like their mothers. Kirby both loves and fears Greer. River and Max’s firstborn is a hellion when life pisses her off. I’m relieved my daughter’s drama tends to be for show.
“I’m not afraid of anyone,” she says whenever she gets scared. “I have the biggest daddy, and he can stomp on monsters.”
“Yeah!” Caen will always yell in response because he’s a follower.
Kirby is super friendly, bouncing around between the kid groups. She isn’t as territorial as her mama. She’ll laugh with easygoing Eamon or dress up with her princess pal, Carina. I see her roughhousing with Greer and singing in a pretend band with Iggy and Ozzy. Sometimes, she’ll plop down and tell stories to River’s shy, youngest girl, Reese.
“She might not be as bossy as Greer,” Shelby says one day when we watch the kids run around the backyard, “but she’s the leader. Our baby is going to rule the world.”
Shelby’s a great mom, of course. I worried more about me. Kids are small and easy to break. There were times when I’d hear them wailing, and the dogs barking, and I felt myself in retreat. What the hell could a man like me do against tiny people and animals?
“Figure it out,” Shelby says one day and walks out of the bedroom. “Pretend this is the club, and they’re your men. Go SGT-at-Arms on them.”
I admit to cussing a little at Shelby when she leaves me with that crying baby and screaming toddler. The dogs lose their shit every time the kids freak out at the same time. I don’t know where to start, but I figure it out. Just like Shelby knew I would.
“I watched you on the security cam,” she murmurs afterward as we lounge on our dark leather living room couch. “You’re never sexier than when on daddy duty.”
“You ditched me,” I mutter, not giving in right away. Sometimes, I gotta make Shelby work for those good fucks she craves so much.
“You’re right. I should be punished with no sex for a week.”
“You couldn’t just let me have the win, could you?” I grumble while she laughs her ass off.
After settling down, she strokes my jaw and whispers, “How about I reward you with double sex to make up for the no sex I’m getting?”
“That seems fair,” I say while inhaling her watermelon scent.
Marriage and fatherhood feel so easy sometimes that I don’t know why I ever worried. Then I’ll find myself thinking like I used to. How the world is shit. People are assholes. No one is worth nothing, especially me.
Those feelings don’t last long. I got too much good stuff in my life now. Shelby loves me more than herself. My kids always want me close to them. Our family is like how Shelby and Shane are with their parents. That’s a good kind of loving. How can the world be shit when my family lives in it?
Every year, when it’s time for the Reapers Ride, I consider faking an illness to get out of going. Of course, I love the road. We take different routes each year, stopping at famous dives and having a good time. The reason I still don’t wanna go is that my little girl will look at me and say, “I come too, Daddy?” How can I say no to that perfect little person?
Shelby never lets me weasel out, though. She knows Kirby and Caen will be fine