an old friend today at school. A friend of a friend. Anyway, they kindly reminded me of a few things I didn’t want to remember. Now I want to forget.”
Could he beat around the bush any further? “Okay, and? That doesn’t explain why you’re acting so odd.”
“Am I acting odd? Is it odd to want to talk to your roommate?”
“Shh,” I hush, cringing at his loud tone.
“Sit down and I will.”
I shrink and sit down, hoping none of my tables are looking this way. “Happy?” I grumble.
“No. Are you?”
“I thought I wasn’t allowed to ask about your life? We’re roommates.”
He looks taken aback by my outburst. “Is that what you want to be?”
“No,” I admit. “I want to be your friend. I like you. But you’re so cold and closed off. All you want me around for is to get you laid.”
“I want you around for more than that.” He takes a bite of pizza and then licks some sauce off his bottom lip, unable to meet my eyes. “When I feel better I won’t want to talk about any of this. Maybe you should get back to work. And bring me another shot.”
I gawk at him. What was all of that for if he’s going to send me away? I grumble insults under my breath as I pour him a shot of whiskey. Men are not only unreliable, they’re a pain in my ass too. I slam his shot down and return to my job.
Kent sits there for hours. Oblivion gets crazy and I need his table, but he still won’t get up. He drinks his beers slowly and talks to a few girls, but even I can tell he’s not into them tonight. He looks as if he’s falling over an imaginary precipice. Something is pushing him and he’s fighting the fall.
At midnight I approach his table with some fried pickles and spicy garlic wings.
He looks up drunkenly from his mug and smiles at me. “Lunch time?” he guesses.
“You’re smashed.”
He giggles. “I can’t feel my face.”
I smirk at him and pop a pickle into my mouth.
“Are you laughing at me?” he demands, almost slipping off his chair.
“Why did you put your thumb in my mouth?” I know I’m taking advantage of his drunken state, but he put his thumb in my mouth and I want to know why.
His eyes widen as he recalls the moment I’m speaking of. “That was so hot, Raina. I want to know how your mouth really feels.” He looks down at his penis as if some clarification will make his comment less unapproachable. “Why did you let me?”
“Will you remember this tomorrow?”
“Probably not,” he admits, chuckling.
I lean forward and look him in the eye. “Because I’ve never reacted to a man the way I do you. I think a part of me might want more than your thumb in my mouth.”
He burps and hiccups. “What?”
A thrill goes through me. “You terrify me because you remind me of my father. You’re unreliable. You’re a drunk. You’re unfaithful. I don’t want that. I shouldn’t want that.”
He narrows his eyes at me. “Unfaithful? How do you know?”
“You show me all the time. You’re an unfaithful type of guy. Tell me the truth. Have you ever been in a relationship and not cheated on the girl you were with?”
I’m shocked by the pain that unfurls in him. “I didn’t mean to cheat on her,” he slurs. “I loved her. I loved that damn woman. But I couldn’t say no to the girl. And you know what? I don’t even remember her name. Her pussy ruined my life and I don’t even remember her name.” He covers his face with his hands.
“Was she your girlfriend?” I peek around us, hoping none of my tables will overhear our conversation.
“She was my fiancée.” He dropped his hands. “And I loved her. I love her. Right? No. I don’t love her. I can’t love her. She loves someone else now.” His eyes glaze over and he blinks at me. “I saw her over the summer. I can’t forget her. I saw her over the summer. Did I say that already?” He laughs at himself and sits back, eyes closing.
I look down at my food. Happy now? Kent said he didn’t do the girlfriend thing. But he did the fiancée thing with her. I take a bite of my wings and then another as he hangs in the balance. “Kent?”