My Life in Shambles - Karina Halle Page 0,32

… it’s like my mother was the bridge. The one thing he’d always talk about is what my mother wanted for me. To fall in love, to marry, to have children. My father’s old-fashioned, says the same thing.”

Oh. I see. Because his father might be dying, he wants him to think he’s finally found love for the long run. He wants him to know that he’s going to be okay when he’s gone. Or maybe it’s a lot more complicated than that. All I know is all of this is way over my head.

“I’m sorry,” Padraig says, placing his coffee on the side table and getting out of bed. He starts pacing across the room. “It’s a bloody stupid idea. Like I said, I’ve been up for hours and my mind was getting away from me.”

“It’s not stupid,” I say gently. “I totally get trying to please your parents.”

“It’s not even that I’m trying to please him,” he says, his words coming out hard. “It’s just…” He trails off and stops in the middle of the room, blinking rapidly and then closing his eyes. He sways on his feet for a second and then opens his eyes.

“Are you okay?” I ask, leaning forward. “Why don’t you sit down?”

I don’t expect him to listen but he does, sitting on the end of the bed, his back to me. “I’m fine,” he says quickly. “Just got dizzy for a second.”

“I don’t blame you. You’re overwhelmed. This has got to be so hard on you.”

“Yea,” he says, and seems to zone out for a moment, staring at the wall. “It is.” He clears his throat and gets back up. “I’ll manage. I always do.” He turns around and eyes the coffee in my hand. “Can I get you another one?”

“I’m still working on this,” I tell him.

“Look. I’m really sorry I sprang that on ye. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“Honestly, I would think the exact same way. Your father is sick, Padraig. You want him to know you’ll be fine. It makes perfect sense to me.” I pause and let my mind run away with me the way his did with him. Pretending to be someone’s fiancé is a preposterous idea and yet the intentions are good. He wants to put his father at ease, he wants to heal the gap between them. And it’s not just a someone. It’s this man who I don’t think I’m ready to say goodbye to. “How far away is the town?” I ask.

He raises a brow and folds his arms across his chest. Nope, definitely not ready to say goodbye to those biceps either. “It’s a two-hour drive.” He cocks his head to the side. “Don’t tell me you’re actually considering it.”

I see the hope on his face and it hits me in the gut like a hammer, because I know that look, I know that hope. That maybe there’s an answer to something you’ve been fighting with for a long time.

And yet I know I have to squash that very hope before it grows, before it hurts.

“I wish I could. But I couldn’t do that to my sisters. Come with them on a sisters’ trip, one we’ve really needed, and then ditch them for a guy.”

He shrugs. “Fair enough.” He clears his throat. “Listen, I’m going to jump in the shower. You’re welcome to join me.”

Even though the invitation is clear in his eyes and my body hums at the thought of getting him naked again, I think the smart thing to do would be to just go. Go before I change my mind and start considering his proposition. Go before things get any more complicated.

“I think I’m just going to take a taxi back to the hotel. I’m sure my sisters are worried about me.” Or supremely hung over.

Padraig nods. I expected him to look at least a little disappointed but his face is blank. “No problem. I’ll drive ye there.”

“It’s really no bother, take your shower.”

He gives me a small smile. “Listen, darlin’,” he says, and the way he rolls his Rs over my nickname gives me a thrill inside. “I wouldn’t be much of a man if I did that. I’ll drive ye. I want to.” He bends down and picks my dress up off the floor. “You want to put this on or do ye want to borrow a shirt?”

“Borrow?”

“I mean take. It’ll be too big on you but I’m sure you can tie it,” he says, going to

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