My Life After Now - By Jessica Verdi Page 0,80
and their friends from work, so I took the baby and let them do the proud-parent thing while Evan and I went and sat on the stoop out front. The April air was warm, and the trees were beginning to blossom.
“You’re going to be a star,” he murmured in my ear. I turned my face to his and answered him with a deep kiss.
“I love you,” I whispered, my eyes still closed and my lips still grazing against his. I felt his mouth curl into a smile.
We still hadn’t had sex, but we weren’t in any rush. Sex complicated things, especially in our case, and after Evan’s HIV test had come back negative, neither of us was particularly eager to go down that road again. So, for now, we were perfectly content taking it slow.
I rested my head on his shoulder and readjusted my sleeping baby sister in my arms. She was the mellowest, happiest baby I’d ever seen. I couldn’t help but suspect that somehow, she knew what a bullet she’d dodged.
As planned, Lisa had stayed with us until she gave birth. After Papa’s virtual in-home imprisonment of her, we all knew she’d be out the door as soon as the baby was born, but what I never could have predicted was that she would leave the baby with us. My dads told me later, though, that they’d known it was a possibility for a while. Lisa asking me to name the baby was the red flag.
I don’t know how she looked at that gorgeous, tiny, healthy baby girl and saw anything other than perfection, but Lisa took one look at her and freaked, just as she had with me time and time again. I finally came to realize that it wasn’t me that wasn’t good enough; it was her. She would never be a mother, and she knew it.
I thought about it a lot, and my theory was that all Lisa really wanted was someone to love her. But when her drug addiction and severe lack of any form of compassion prevented that, she decided she would have a baby. In her mind, her baby would love her, no matter what. And who knows, that may have been true. But the variable in the equation was Lisa. After she gave birth, it became clear that she simply wasn’t capable of loving the baby in return. And that posed a problem.
So Dad and Papa adopted her, and I finally gave her a name. Viola Freeman-Moore. She’d only been in the world a month and already it was impossible to imagine life without her.
• • •
After dinner, I walked Evan to his car.
“I’ll call you later,” he promised, and kissed me good-bye.
I watched his taillights disappear around the corner, and then looked down at the object in my hands. A stamped envelope, addressed to Lee Harrison, 177 Spring Street, Apt. 5B, New York, NY, 10012.
Inside was a single sheet of hot pink paper: a schedule for Roxie’s meetings. I slid it into the empty mailbox and flipped the little flag up.
Maybe Lee would never show up, but maybe he would. And if he did, we would be there to help him. Because, when it comes down to it, life really isn’t all that bad.
And of that I was absolutely positive.
HIV/AIDS at a Glance
What is HIV?
The human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) is a condition that breaks down the immune system so that the body is unable to fight off harmful diseases and infections. The virus is contracted via the sharing of bodily fluids including semen, vaginal fluids, blood, and breast milk.
What is AIDS?
Acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS) is the most advanced stage of HIV. Since HIV is the virus that initially infects the body, not everyone with HIV has AIDS, but everyone with AIDS has HIV.
Is there a cure?
There is currently no cure or vaccine for HIV or AIDS. However, early testing, care, and treatment (such as medication) can greatly slow the progression of the virus.
Where did HIV and AIDS come from?
Though no one knows the exact cause, genetic research indicates that HIV originated in Africa during the early 1900s. AIDS was first recognized in 1981 and has caused an estimated 30 million deaths (as of 2009). As of 2010, approximately 34 million people around the world are living with HIV.
Facts and Figures
• Though teenagers make up only 25 percent of the sexually active population, they account for nearly half (50 percent) of new sexually transmitted infection (STI) cases.
• Over 61,000 young people