My Life After Now - By Jessica Verdi Page 0,63

clasping his hands together. “Anyone up for a movie?”

“Actually, I’m going to head to bed. Love you guys,” I said.

“Love you too, honey,” Dad and Papa said in unison.

I checked my phone again one more time before crawling into bed, fully aware that Einstein’s definition of insanity was repeating the same action over and over and expecting a different result.

• • •

When Lisa came home from the hospital on Sunday, I stayed closed away in my room all day, staring at my computer and waiting for Ty to log on to instant messenger. He didn’t. That night, I finally broke down and called him, but it went straight to voicemail. I didn’t leave a message. It was an enormous effort just to bring the phone from my ear and press “end call.”

I was utterly worn out. I’d spent so much energy thinking about Ty these past two days that I had gone into overdraft. Or maybe it was an effect of the medication. All I knew was that I was exhausted, emotionally and physically.

I laid my head down on my desk and let the barriers down against the one thought I’d actively been avoiding. Could Ty really have just been using me to get ahead in his career? After all, he hadn’t come crawling back until I’d gotten the commercial.

But, I weakly argued with myself, he’d seemed so genuine when he told me he missed me. He was exactly the same Ty Friday that he’d been when we were officially together. Was he really that good of an actor? Or (and it killed me to even think this) had our entire year-and-a-half-long relationship been an act?

Was being with the best actress in the school really all that mattered to him? Were Elyse and I some sort of conquests for him?

I shook the thought from my mind. Our time together was real. It had to be.

But then Monday afternoon rolled around and brought with it a fresh dose of clarity.

Because of the lingering effects of the snowstorm, we’d had a two-hour delay in the morning, and homeroom was canceled. So it was dress rehearsal time before I saw anyone from the drama club.

I was sitting on the edge of the stage lacing up my costume boots when Ty and Elyse walked in. Together. Holding hands.

I almost fell into the orchestra pit.

“What the hell?” I shouted. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared.

Ty immediately dropped Elyse’s hand and I actually saw him glance at the exit, like I was really going to let him escape. Fueled by a much-needed burst of adrenaline, I leapt off the stage and stormed his way. In the seconds it took to reach him and Elyse, understanding took hold of me. My fears had not been unfounded at all. By the time we were actually face to face, I was more scared than mad.

“Follow me,” I said, and led them into an isolated hallway. “What’s going on?” I asked quietly once we were alone.

Ty’s eyes darted around nervously. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you do, Ty.” I nodded toward Elyse. “Does she know?”

Elyse was looking back and forth between us. “Do I know what?”

I stared at Ty and slowly breathed in and out. “I thought you weren’t with her anymore?”

“I…changed my mind,” he said.

“Right.” I nodded slightly. “Because I said I couldn’t get you a part in the commercial.”

He wouldn’t look at me. Nothing more was said for a long second. I was waiting for him to confess or at least offer an explanation. He was probably waiting for me to go away.

“Okay, seriously, what is going on?” Elyse asked.

I looked at Ty. “Do you want to tell her or should I?”

He just kept staring at his shoes.

I let out an exasperated sigh and turned to Elyse. “As much as I don’t like you, you deserve to know the truth. Ty came over to my house on Friday and we had sex.”

Elyse stiffened and audibly sucked in air.

“He told me you guys weren’t together anymore,” I defended myself. But then I realized something. He hadn’t said they’d broken up. He’d just said things “weren’t working.” I had substituted my own meaning for his words. Well, no way I was going to admit that now. “Or something to that effect.”

Elyse looked to Ty, her face stricken with disbelief. “Is that true?” she whispered.

Ty shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe.”

“But we were together all weekend. How…how could you do that?”

Oh god. He was such scum. He went