just eighteen, and both had relationships go wrong in between. Now they were treading carefully; Sarah more than Joe possibly, since she had Ollie to consider. They’d both changed since they’d first dated, inevitably, but it was reassuring that Joe seemed fundamentally the same, considerate and caring. He’d spent a good hour with Ollie, playing with Duplo, before they’d left this evening, while – not sure how one did dating any more – Sarah had taken her time making herself presentable enough to be seen out in public. He’d wanted Ollie to feel at ease with him, he’d said, reminding her why she’d once loved him, and causing her a pang of regret at having lost him.
Seating Ollie on the bench table and collecting up his beaker, Joe passed it to him and picked up his own drink. ‘Cheers,’ he said, clinking with him and taking a glug.
‘Cheers,’ Ollie said manfully, and did likewise.
Sarah smiled and took a sip of her wine. Joe really was good with him. She couldn’t believe he didn’t have children of his own. His wife hadn’t wanted them apparently, which had become a problem between them. Joe had been glad of it in the end, he’d said. It had made things less complicated when he’d discovered his wife had been stuck on her ex. When he’d talked about it, he had smiled in the c’est la vie way he did whenever he wanted people to believe something didn’t bother him. He’d clearly been devastated at finding his wife was cheating on him, though. Sarah had seen the pain in his eyes.
‘I think you’ve won him over.’ She glanced again at Ollie, who was now emulating Joe’s every move, planting his beaker back on the table and twirling it around as Joe did with his glass.
‘I’m obviously irresistible,’ Joe said with a wink. ‘So, is everything okay?’ He nodded towards her phone.
‘Yes,’ Sarah said quickly, though she didn’t feel very okay. She felt bewildered. Do you mind if I bring Ollie to meet Laura? her ex had asked.
Since she’d never even met the woman, Sarah had had no idea how to respond. She’d had to steel herself to text him back. It’s serious then?
Steve had taken a minute, then, Yes, he’d replied. We’re thinking of living together. Laura has her own place, so it makes sense for me to move in there.
Sarah felt as if she’d been hit by a thunderbolt. He’d only been going out with this Laura for a few months. He hadn’t even found himself a place to live yet; he was still crashing at his mother’s, for goodness’ sake. Had it really taken him such a short time to move on? She felt cheated on – ridiculously, since she and Steve weren’t together any more. She also felt inadequate, as if the failure of their relationship had been all down to her, which was definitely ridiculous. They simply hadn’t been compatible. Steve was so laid-back sometimes he was horizontal, which had been part of the problem between them. It had taken her a while to realise that his lack of involvement might have something to do with the fact that he hadn’t been ready to make the crucial decision to commit, despite the fact that they had a child together.
And then came his father’s stroke. Steve, who was close to him, had been distraught. Sarah should have been there more for him, but she’d been struggling herself to look after Ollie whilst also working full time. She’d been so tired, and looking back, she supposed she’d needed support too, especially after an early miscarriage, which, since Steve was dealing with so much emotionally, she hadn’t mentioned. She’d told herself she could cope. Both of them exhausted and emotional, they’d ended up arguing. Eventually, they hadn’t even argued. They’d simply stopped communicating.
Sarah shook herself. She hated dwelling on the past. She had Ollie, a future to look forward to. It had come out of the blue, though; Steve suddenly making the momentous decision to move in with someone else had rocked the foundations of the life she was trying to rebuild for her and her child.
‘Another drink?’ Joe asked, indicating her glass – which she’d just emptied rather too quickly, she realised. ‘I thought you might want to cheer us on rather than get involved in the footie practice, since you’re wearing heels.’
Sarah looked down at her feet. The shoes were wedges, but too high to run around a pub garden in. Should