broken between all of them. She didn’t know what or how and she was so very confused.
Fei Long regarded her coldly, but his jaw was clenched. The vein in his neck pulsed and she could see the rise and fall of his chest. He was holding himself back with control strained so tightly that it was ready to snap. All her hours with him, in close quarters in quiet reflection, told her this.
‘Bai Shen was only trying to make you—’
‘Angry,’ he finished for her.
She was going to say jealous, but she fell silent, realising how humiliating and revealing that thought was.
‘I am angry.’ His tone remained flat. ‘You’re under my care, my protection. As is everyone in this household. I won’t allow anyone to be mistreated like that.’
‘But he’s your friend.’
‘Not any more.’
Whatever Bai Shen had intended, he’d gone too far. Fei Long was closing himself off. The walls of his ire rose around him.
‘Why are you doing this?’ she whispered.
She wanted the uneasy peace between them back—all those unspoken thoughts and hopes, as frustrating as they were.
His stone-cold voice pierced through her. ‘Go outside and close the door. You’re not to be in here.’
* * *
Fei Long waited for the door to shut and separate him from the rest of the world. From Yan Ling. He continued to wait long enough for her to walk the short length of the corridor. She’d go back to the gardens or retire to her room. Wherever she went, it would never be far enough. He would still think of her and seek her out to the furthest reaches of his senses.
The grasslands of Khitan were not far enough.
If he’d had his sword, he would have killed that fool Bai Shen. The actor was always looking for an excuse to goad him, but by all the demons in hell, this wasn’t a game to Fei Long. Seeing Yan Ling in another man’s arms had been the most vicious of taunts, because Fei Long knew what was inevitable. In less than two months, she would be taken from him to be delivered as a peace offering.
Fei Long sat on his bed at the far end of the room and sank his head in his hands. Yan Ling slept in a similar one. He’d been in her chamber not two weeks ago. He knew how her skin glimmered beneath the moonlight. Knew where she slept only a short distance away from his chamber.
That bastard had been kissing her. Kissing her. Yan Ling didn’t deserve to be treated like that.
He dug his fingers into his scalp until there was edifying pain. All those afternoons they’d spent together. Alone. Unattended. He’d had thoughts, but thoughts only. He had always remained respectful toward her as their stations demanded. He would never take such liberties. Yan Ling trusted him and she had worked so hard to better herself.
The room grew hot, nearly stifling as the day reached noon time. He lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. There was too much for him to do, but he wasn’t yet ready to leave this confinement.
There would be no afternoon lesson today. He couldn’t bear being so close to Yan Ling. He didn’t know why he’d lashed out at her as well. His anger had no beginning and no end.
There might not be a lesson tomorrow either.
Chapter Thirteen
Fei Long declared that there would be no lesson for the last few days and Yan Ling was too intimidated to question him about it after he’d coldly put her in her place. Bai Shen didn’t come by for the rest of the week either. She was hoping he would return to set everything right. The two men were almost like brothers—brothers who traded insults and fought and were opposite in every way—but brothers none the less.
If the scoundrel had just returned with a humble apology and a few witty remarks the next day, all might have been forgiven. Instead Bai Shen stayed away and Fei Long continued to shut doors between them. Without her morning or afternoon lessons, it fell upon Dao and Yan Ling to come up with their own routine.
Dao had no complaints. She’d ushered Yan Ling to the market, holding a parasol over her like a dutiful attendant.
‘We don’t have to be so formal,’ Yan Ling protested. It was important for them to maintain appearances, but it still felt unnatural being coddled so.
‘You don’t want to take up any sun and get dark,’ Dao insisted.