A Much Younger Man - Z.A. Maxfield Page 0,74
don’t want to talk about this, but I really feel like we should. How are you feeling today, sweetheart?”
“I’m good.” Petulantly, I picked up a piece of bread and buttered it a little too thoroughly. What did I care? I wasn’t trying to live forever. “Everything’s golden.”
“Oh, honey. Did you talk to Beck?”
“I did, and everything’s fine. He’s still stopping by to feed our stray kittens.”
“Well, that’s good.”
“I have no doubt everything will continue as if—” I never lost my heart. “Everything will be fine.”
“Darling,” she put her hand on mine. “Now, this is just a suggestion, but maybe give Dylan a second chance. You weren’t expecting him, and you got off on the wrong foot, but I’m sure if—”
“No.”
“You haven’t even considered it.”
“It’s not going to happen.”
She pouted. “All I’m saying is that he seems like a lovely family man.”
“Lindy said he’s not interested, hon,” said my father. “Let it go.”
“But—”
“Our son knows his own mind, Judy.”
After a few minutes of silence where all three of us pretended to be fascinated by the sun’s final descent into the sea, the waiter came to the table with our meals.
I wanted to love the food, but again, I barely tasted it. I had another glass of wine—absolutely my limit—and coffee with dessert.
My mother got some kind of chocolate extravaganza to share with Dad.
Goddamnit, I wanted what they had.
Sure, I was wrapped up in my work, but Dad had been too—he had been on a goddamn aircraft carrier for the first half of my life. Mom had seemed content to man the home fires and found things to occupy her mind and her time when he’d been gone. When they were together, it was delightful. They had embarrassed the hell out of me back then, displaying their affection publicly and sneaking in make-out sessions when they thought I wasn’t around.
Why had I not been enough for my lovers?
Why had I been such a consistent disappointment?
“Sweetheart?”
“Hm?” I guessed I’d been holding my coffee halfway to my lips for too long. I put it down.
“Would you like to take a little walk?”
“I don’t think so. I’m still catching up on sleep. I should go home.” I kissed Mom goodbye. Dad stood and gave me a bear hug.
Before he even guessed what I was up to, I picked up the check wallet. “Dinner was great, guys. I’ll take care of this.”
“Aw, no, son.” Dad grabbed for it.
“Nuh-uh. Done deal.” I held it away from him. “You have a good night.”
“You too.” Mom blew me a kiss. “Sweet dreams. See you here for dinner tomorrow?”
“Sure.” Friday. Pie day. Also, my guitar lesson, but I doubted Beck would want to carry on with those. At least not for a while. I didn’t want to sit at home thinking about things I couldn’t have. “I’ll text to let you know when I’m on my way.”
“Drive safe,” Dad admonished me.
“You golfing tomorrow?” He nodded. “Then you too.”
My mother snickered as I walked away. “He still says that every time.”
The joke was too old, but just then I felt too old as well.
Too old for Beck. Too old for tears.
Way too old for a broken heart that felt like it would never, ever heal.
Chapter Twenty-Five
There was a news van in front of the clinic on Friday morning following up on the Gilroy case. What had started as an altercation between mother and son and led to the discovery of the neglected animals had grown more grim because the old woman had died in the hospital.
While it had nothing to do with me, it was likely news of the case would go national now that there might be homicide charges against the son.
They wanted an in-depth interview about what I’d seen, but I gave them only the barest facts. I’d been there on behalf of some unfortunate animals, and beyond that, I knew nothing.
I was sure they’d already gotten a statement from Jeanie. She was far better positioned to give them a follow-up than I was. I’d handled the press before, so it didn’t faze me, but Lena was discombobulated.
“They were so pushy,” she complained. “I kept telling them I wasn’t there, but then they asked what you said about it and how you felt about euthanizing animals, and I was like, nuh-uh. No comment, motherfuckers.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that.” The last thing I wanted was a member of my staff putting words into my mouth.
“Did they bother Travis or April?”
“They hid in back until you got here.”
“Good for them. What’s