This Much is True - Tia Louise Page 0,81
Clyde?” The hint of optimism in his tone aches in my chest. I hate to disappoint him.
“Scout got him on record admitting they put the drugs in your trunk, and you got caught, and they were using you as a mule… It was him who reported you for violating parole.”
His glittering eyes harden. “And?”
I inhale slowly before answering. “The lawyer said it wouldn’t hold up. Clyde said your dad’s name as the initial contact, but he never directly named you as the mule… She said because Scout’s a celebrity, his lawyer could argue he was bragging, making it up to impress us.” I exhale sadly. “She said it’s not enough.”
He looks away, over his shoulder, and I can feel his body tense through the barrier. He turns away, and before my eyes, it’s like a wall goes up between us, more impenetrable than the one currently standing.
My heart beats faster, and I want to break through this plexiglass and hold him, beg him to keep believing. I’m afraid it’s too late.
“So that’s it.” The resignation in his voice makes me panicky.
“We’re not stopping. Scout and I are both thinking of new ways—”
“It’s over, Hope.” His voice is flat. “I knew it when I lost my phone. It’s time to stop fighting and do this time.”
“No!”
His eyes flicker to mine, and his expression turns dark. A cold stream of dread filters through my veins.
“I’ve been thinking about it, and I made a decision…” His brow is lowered. “You need to get back to your business. You’ve wasted enough time on me. You need to follow up with that guy and get his help while he’s offering it.”
“But you said—”
“I said a lot when I thought things were different. You’ve got to live your life.”
The pain in my chest radiates up to my temples. “Are you taking back what you said to me?”
“Things change. You have to walk through the doors when they open. Next time I hear about you, I want it to be for the grand opening of your new Pancake Paradise.”
My heart is in my throat, and I’m doing my best to keep the tears from falling. “Would you even hear about something like that in here?”
“I’ll hear about it.”
I can’t bear it. I can’t let him push me away without telling him, if only this once. “I love you, John.”
His eyes close, and his chin drops. The sexy muscle in his perfect jaw moves, and he shakes his head. I watch him inhale slowly, then exhale before he breaks my heart. “Don’t.”
“Don’t?” My voice goes high. “Don’t love you?”
“Don’t say that.” He lifts his face, and our eyes meet. His are stormy and sad. “Don’t come here anymore. I don’t want to see you. I want you to get on with your life and leave us where we belong, in the past.”
A hot tear hits my cheek. His eyes flicker to it, and his throat moves. He puts his mask on and goes to the door, waving to the guard and leaving me alone in the visiting space, staring at an empty room, an empty chair.
My chest is a bleeding hole. More tears start to fall, and I hiccup a breath. Oh, God, I’m going to break down. Cupping a hand over my mouth, I quickly go to the exit. I run to Metallicar before the uncontrollable sobs begin. I hold my hand against my face and close my eyes, fighting for control. I have to hold on. I have to.
It takes a few minutes before I’m able to complete the blurry drive back to the beach house. When I get there, Scout has left a note saying he’s running an errand. I can’t talk to him right now. I can only talk to one person.
Going to my closet, I take out my weekend bag and pack fast. Anger and sadness and misery make me slam the clothes harder than I normally would.
JR Dunne has pushed me away twice now, and I can’t keep holding on, waiting for him to see how right we are together. If he wants me to do it, I will. I’ll seize my opportunity.
Before I go, I pull the long receipt from my purse and place it on the bar with a note to Scout.
They have your number. You have mine.
If anything changes, let me know.
Lots of love,
Hope
Jr
Telling Hope to leave was the hardest thing I’ve done… since the last time I did it.
Fuck. I tighten my fist, slamming it against the top