This Much is True - Tia Louise Page 0,41

You’re not going to catch anything throwing your hands over your head and screaming like a girl.”

Looking around, I lean into his ear. “I have a problem.

He steps back, curling his lip at me. “Aunt Flo? But you and JR were just—”

“No!” I push his arm hard. “Not that. I need a shower, and I need… Leaning forward I try to say it without moving my lips urhnderwhuur.”

“Who’s Aunt Flo?” Jesse is back beside us, carrying the football.

Scout’s eyes narrow as he tries to figure out what I murmured.

I quickly answer Jesse. “She’s a friend of mine.”

“Why do you call your friend your aunt?”

“I mean, she is my aunt.” I struggle, trying to think of anything. “She’s also my friend. Or not. She’s not a very good friend.”

“Oh, shit!” Scout’s eyebrows shoot up, and I see he’s finally figured out what I said. “Hey, Jesse, run this to your dad. I need to help Miss Hope with something.”

“Okay!” he yells, running to where JR is talking to his grandmother. “Catch, Dad, catch!”

Scout takes my arm. “Come on.”

We head into the house, and he goes straight to the back room. “They’re probably going to be the size of a tent.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this.” I wait in the hall, watching the door. “You think she’d mind if I took a shower?”

“I think she wants you to stay… Oh, hell no.”

“What?” I whisper, looking into the lavender room.

The windows have lavender chiffon curtains with dark purple butterflies that appear hand-painted.

“I did not need to know this about Gran.” He holds up an egg-shaped device, and my eyes go wide.

“Is that a…”

“We-vibe,” he reads, and my hands fly over my eyes.

“That’s none of our business! Focus, Scout!”

“Kinky grandma.” He quickly shoves the vibrator back in the drawer and lifts out a pair of white panties. “I don’t know, but I don’t think they’ll fit you.” He holds them up high between us. “They’re as big as my head.”

“I’ll make it work.” I snatch them from him and head into the bathroom. “Make an excuse for me.”

Stepping into the pink bathroom, I close the door and cringe when I see myself in the mirror. My hair is in desperate need of a wash. I’ve been in this same dress for three days, but at least we did all shower halfway through the drive.

Ten minutes later I’m clean, hair washed with honeysuckle shampoo, which actually smells amazing, and I’m quietly searching under the sink. I manage to find travel size deodorant, a toothbrush, and toothpaste, but there is not a safety pin in sight.

I do find a pair of scissors, which I use to cut the waist down from under my armpits, then I cut the sides apart. Stepping into the massive, white-cotton undies, I make two little snips on each side and tie small knots, top and bottom securely on my hips.

“Dang,” I whisper, turning side to side in the mirror. “That’s not half bad.”

While I wait for the world to begin again, maybe I can host a YouTube channel for wardrobe emergencies. Knotted panties could totally be a thing.

Giving my dress a sniff, I decide it’s not too bad to wear again, like I have a choice. All I have is this dress, my teddy coat, and my iPhone. It’s equipped with Apple pay at least—not that I have much money to spend.

Exiting the bathroom, I hear rattling coming from the kitchen. Following the sound, I find JR sitting at a small, yellow Formica table across from Jesse. They’re playing Uno while Scout stands beside Alice at the counter, slowly cutting thick slices of bread.

It’s such a homey scene. It makes me so happy. “I can help!”

When Alice sees me, she smiles big. “There you are! Were you able to find everything you needed?”

Scout grimaces. “How’d it turn out?”

I want to pinch him. “Good! All good! I’m sorry I didn’t ask you first. We were playing, and I suddenly realized how long it had been since I’d showered.”

“Nonsense!” Alice waves a hand at me and returns to the pot where she’s stirring what looks like Marinara sauce. “But you’re wearing the same dress. John, why don’t you get Hope’s suitcase out of the car?”

“Suitcase?” He looks up just as Jesse yells Uno.

“Oh,” I jump in. “I, um… I didn’t bring a suitcase.”

Alice draws back confused. “But you’ve been driving for three days! You didn’t bring a bag or anything?”

I’m panicking, looking from Scout to JR. “You’re not going to believe,” I exhale,

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