Mr. Smithfield - Louise Bay Page 0,64

all go back to how it was before?

“No,” I said.

“We can fight,” she replied. “But given her position, we might be better off trying to come to an agreement. You might end up with more that way, Gabriel.”

“No,” I repeated. There was no way I was letting her anywhere near Bethany.

“Think about it. We want to avoid a court battle. It’s expensive and will take you away from your daughter. In the end, you’ll have to give her something.”

I hung up. I couldn’t listen to it any longer. I needed to get home. I had to protect what was mine.

Twenty-Seven

Autumn

I put on Bethany’s nightlight and folded back her bed covers. She hopped in without me having to ask twice.

“Sleep tight,” I said, smoothing back her hair. “Don’t let the bed bugs bite.” I kissed her on the forehead and headed out, leaving her alone with her dad. I watched from the doorway as Gabriel bent and told his daughter he loved her.

“Can you stay home tomorrow, Daddy?”

“I don’t know, darling. But I’ll try to come home early more.”

“Margaret likes to have dinner with you,” she said, referring to her dolly. “And Bear Bear.”

“I like having dinner with them as well.”

Something bad had happened. He never came home from work early but this afternoon, he’d returned, changed, and spent the rest of the afternoon with us. Baking animal cookies and decorating them before having a doll’s carpet picnic, during which Bethany licked the icing off at least three quarters of everyone else’s cookies.

I didn’t question him being home. I asked him if he wanted me to leave him and Bethany together and he’d answered with a squeeze of my hand.

It was nice having him spend the afternoon with us unexpectedly, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that tonight, once Bethany was in bed, he was going to tell me about his wife wanting to see him.

I padded downstairs and fixed myself a soda. “You want anything?” I asked as he arrived in the kitchen. “Seems like maybe you need a beer to take the edge off.”

“Yeah. I’ll get a beer. You want one?”

I shook my head, raising the can of soda in my hand. No, I wanted to keep a clear head. I needed to be calm and rational without alcohol putting its two cents into the mix.

“Bad day?” I asked as we headed into the TV room.

“Yeah,” he replied. The dark circles under his eyes made him look older than he was. I was sure he hadn’t had those when he left this morning. When we sat, he shifted me closer to him and put my legs over his.

“Wanna talk about it?” I asked.

“Not really,” he said with a sigh. “But I need to.”

“Whatever it is, there’s always a silver lining,” I said. I believed it was true. Whatever life brought, there were always lessons to be learned, maybe even laughter to be had along the way.

“I wish that were true.”

I slipped my hand into his, wanting to reassure him that everything would work out.

“I saw Penelope today.”

Even though I knew she’d wanted to see him—had known for days that it was a possibility—it was still a shock to hear him say her name and to know that they’d been together today.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I should have told you that it was going to happen, but I thought it would just be a formality. I assumed she just wanted closure and then she’d disappear again, like she did before.”

So she wasn’t going to disappear. She was back. It had always been a possibility; I just thought I could wish it away.

“But it’s not a formality?” What was he trying to say? Were they getting back together?

“You don’t seem shocked,” he said. “I thought you might be upset with me because I’d not told you.”

I wasn’t going to lie to him. “Actually, Hollie told me by accident when I met her for lunch. She assumed I’d know.”

He closed his eyes as if disappointed. “I’m sorry. I should have told you. Why didn’t you say something?”

“I figured you’d tell me if you thought it would affect . . .” I wanted to say us, but I wasn’t sure what us meant. “If you thought I needed to know.”

“I wanted to but . . .” We were both holding back. We were both not saying things and I wasn’t sure if that was because Gabriel was unsure of what to say or because he thought I wouldn’t want to hear it. “Anyway,