feeling nervous while I wait to see what’s happening. I hate that I can’t understand what everyone is saying around me, and I hate that all I can do is sit patiently.
I trust Audun and Caelan, as stupid as that might make me. Maybe it’s this mate bond I share with them now, but I’ve always been pretty good at judging people. I don’t think either of them would purposely put me in a dangerous or uncomfortable situation. At least without a good reason.
“Oh,” I blurt out in surprise when Naren suddenly climbs into my lap. Marieke is busy in the kitchen, and Caelan and Audun smile encouragingly when I glance at them for help. I pat the kid’s back awkwardly as he settles in my lap, and I try to smile when he starts blabbering on in their language that I don’t understand.
Caelan and Audun answer Naren, and they even laugh a few times at whatever the toddler is saying. Naren keeps looking at me and trying to talk to me, and he’s seriously an adorable kid. But I just…really don’t like kids, and never have. They’re loud and fussy and usually smell weird. It doesn’t help that I spent so many years in foster care with Alistair suckered into babysitting tons of younger children, and being around kids now always makes me dredge up uncomfortable memories.
The guys keep giving me these weird, unreadable side glances, and it’s making me freak out the longer I hold Naren in my lap. I’m trying to keep it cool, but I’ve just realized that I’m their fucking mate and they’re probably expecting me to pop out a bunch of kids. Sooner rather than later, I’m sure.
When I was dating Bryson, we talked about having kids. But the conversations were always super vague that I didn’t worry much. Every shifter I’ve ever known is extremely territorial, and they love big families. I just hoped that having kids would be something I could put off, and that hopefully I’d come around to the idea of being a mother when I was older. Even now, the idea still really doesn’t appeal to me. And I’m not a weak-minded girl trying to impress a dumbass wolf shifter anymore.
I got my last depo shot a few weeks ago, so I won’t have to worry about getting pregnant for a couple of months at least. I just hope that in that time, I can figure out how to tell my new mates I’m just not ready to have kids. There has to be some form of birth control in this world, right? The four of them have been incredibly sweet to me, so I really hope they’re understanding about this.
Naren gets down from my lap when Marieke finally joins us at the table, carrying a large tray with a tea set. Neither of the guys move to help her when she pours each of them a cup. It seems a little weird and insulting to me, but I follow their lead and remain still and silent as she pours a cup for me too. When she’s finished, she bows deeply and says something in a reverent tone.
The guys mumble something that I hope means thank you, but they both look slightly uncomfortable when I raise my eyebrows at them. I thank Marieke in English, since I have no idea how to say it in whatever language they speak here. She appears pleased, and she takes a seat across from me at the table as she pours her own cup.
Caelan and Audun take a sip of their tea at the same time, and I slowly lift my cup to my lips as I subtly glance around the table for some sugar or honey. It doesn’t look like there is any, unfortunately. The tea is extremely strong and bitter, and I set my cup down in relief when Runa walks up behind me.
“Podívej se na tohle,” she says as she sets a large book, a pen, and some paper in front of me.
She nods encouragingly when I hesitate to open the book, so I quickly open the front cover and gasp in surprise. It’s not a book—it’s a photo album! The photo taking up the entire first page is similar to the photos I found in guys’ rooms. It looks old, all black and white, but the people in the photo are moving. Even though I’ve seen this trick already and I know that magic clearly exists in the world,