I cry for about an hour after the guys leave me alone at the cabin.
Like some pathetic-ass damsel in distress, I sit next to the front window wailing like a little bitch, hoping they’ll come back and love me. The house feels so strange and terrifying without them here, and I’ve never felt lonelier in my entire life than I do now.
I finally snap out of it, thank god, and now I’m just pissed. Stupid Maalik thinks he’s too good for me? That I’m not good enough to be their mate? What a fucking prick! Those guys would be lucky to have me, and I guarantee they’ll never find a girl hotter or more amazing than me to be their mate. They have no idea what they’re missing.
Since I have all the time in the world, assuming those jerks won’t be back until morning, I decide to snoop through the house. Unlike last time I looked around, I’m not going to bother trying to be sneaky about it. They’ll be able to smell me on everything anyways, so why try to hide it?
I start in the living room and kitchen, making sure to check every single drawer, chest, cabinet, and closet. My anger dissipates for a couple of minutes when I discover the pantry and freezer behind the kitchen. They’re huge, and there’s so much food that we could probably survive for months up here without ever having to leave the house. The pantry holds tons of jars and canisters with different ingredients, and even some things that look pre-prepared. It’s probably ridiculous of me, but I really admire these men for being so organized and practical.
We probably could have been happy together. They could have cared for me and spoiled me, and I would have spoiled them right back. I would have done my best to learn their language, and they would have helped me find Alistair. And Al would have been so freaking happy for me. All I’ve ever wanted is a real family, and to be loved. Really, truly, loved.
Reule, Maalik, Audun, and Caelan clearly share a very close bond. I’m only just starting to discover how close they really are, and how special and important they are in this realm. I know I still have so much to learn about them, and even though I only spent a couple of hours with them, I just know in my heart that I could have fit perfectly into their family.
My hurt and anger return in full force. They don’t want me as a mate.
Bryson was right. Who would want me as a mate? I’m nothing special. I never finished high school, and I’m not particularly skilled at anything. The only reason I landed the job as Madame Deverell’s assistant was because of Alistair, and I wasn’t gunning for immortality like most humans are. I know I’m attractive, but that doesn’t mean much, does it? There are other pretty girls in my realm, and probably this one too.
Tears prick at my eyes again as I stomp down the hallway toward the bedrooms. It’s just not fair, any of it. I step into Reule’s room first, and I frown when I see the fireplace already lit. Maalik was the last one in the bedrooms before they all left. I thought he was in his room, or maybe the bathroom. But he must have come in here to light the fire, assuming I’d sleep in Reule’s bed.
The rational part of my brain understands he probably did it to be sweet. I’ve spent the most time with Reule, so it makes sense for him to think I’d be most comfortable in his bedroom. But the totally irrational part of me is livid that Maalik would assume anything about me or think I’d ever show favoritism between the four of them. I can sleep wherever the hell I want! After Reule showed me that book and I came to terms with being their mate, I was ready to throw myself at all four of them, to let them pleasure me and ravage me. But they all fucking left me!
I angrily open the drawers of Reule’s dresser and pull out all of his clothes, throwing them haphazardly all over the room. I do the same thing to the drawers of his nightstand, throwing out everything besides the photographs he has there. As soon as I’m finished going through his things, I jump onto his bed and roll