The Moment of Letting Go - J. A. Redmerski Page 0,69

that I’m not making our inevitable separation more difficult by becoming the shoulder I sense he desperately needs.

“What’s really bothering you?” I ask softly, trying to be comforting; it hurts my heart to see his hurting. “I’m here for you if you need someone to talk to.”

Luke’s chin draws back, his smiling eyes eclipsed by hardening eyebrows. “Nothing’s bothering me, Sienna,” he says, and although it sounds entirely believable, I don’t believe it.

He pats the table with the palm of his hand and a long, drawn-out sigh bursts through his lips.

“Damn, I am such a clueless dick sometimes,” he says. “Seriously, I didn’t mean to give you any crybaby vibes.”

“No, no,” I say, shaking my hand at him, palm forward, “you haven’t.” I follow that comment up with laughter, an instinctive reaction to combat what my question seems to have caused.

And it doesn’t go unnoticed to me that I failed miserably at my attempt to open him up on the issue.

Luke laughs out loud, tossing his head back, and then he looks right at me. “See what you’ve done to me?” He points at me with a crooked index finger. “This is your fault.”

My mouth falls open and my eyes get big.

“How is it my fault?!”

His laughter fills the night air.

“You borrowed my balls and never gave them back.”

Now I’m the one rolling with laughter.

Luke points to the back screen door. “Go in there. Right now. And get them before I start my menstrual cycle.”

I cackle, throwing my neck back over the chair.

“Hurry up!” he shouts and it just makes me laugh harder.

Finally I manage to drop my bare feet onto the wood floor of the lanai and rush into the house, the screen door slapping against my heels on the way in, and I pretend to grab his balls from my purse. And when I run back outside I present them to him in one hand. He doesn’t seem to approve, cocking an eyebrow up at me from his chair beside the table. He looks at my hand and then up at me, down at my hand again, up at me again. Realizing, I roll my eyes and bring my other hand up so that it looks like it takes both to hold them, and slowly his grin begins to lengthen.

“Y’know,” I say, “this is the stupidest thing I’ve ever experienced with anyone in my life.” I’m trying so hard not to laugh, but the huge smile on my face gives everything away.

He goes through the motions of taking his balls back and then, to my surprise, fits his hands about my waist and pulls me onto his lap. I become breathless. My nerve endings stir and race, sending a tingling sensation like a wave through my limbs. He leans forward and grazes the side of my neck with his lips. My heart thrums behind my rib cage; my mouth feels dry, my lungs empty, my heart full.

“Stupid, maybe,” he says and presses his lips against my neck, “but it feels right.”

I turn a little on his lap so I can see his eyes and he looks deeply into mine, one of his hands fixed against my thigh, the other fitted at my waist just above my hip.

“I’m glad you decided to stay,” he whispers, his eyes lingering on my lips for an intense moment before finding my eyes again.

“So am I,” I whisper back.

Luke’s lips part mine slowly, and it feels like my whole body sighs as his mouth searches mine, carefully, yet with passion and intent. The heat of his warm tongue tangles around mine, making my insides tremble and shiver. I feel like I’m going to come apart in his arms, lose complete control of my muscles and become mush on his lap. I inhale his breath, feeling like I need it as much as I need my own, and my hands somehow find their way to his neck, where I probe the muscles under my fingertips. Luke kisses me hungrily, one hand fitted underneath my throat, the other holding tighter onto my waist; I can feel the tips of his strong fingers pressing into my flesh, and his hardness beneath me, which practically sends me over the edge with need.

Gasping, I pull away, breaking the kiss, and just stare into his eyes.

I can’t let this happen.

I could sleep with him. I could take advantage of this vacation and everything it has to offer. There’s nothing wrong with a brief sexual encounter every now and then