then, when he thought of home, the pain of what had happened cascaded over him.
When he was finally back in the hot seat, he took in the people surrounding him. All of them strangers who only a fortnight ago had never been in his life. He pined for the fatherhood that had never been forthcoming, not for the first time. Wouldn’t it have been nice to have a son or daughter by his side right now? Instead, he only had a nephew, who’d moved to Australia some years ago.
He had friends, of course, mostly from the allotments. They’d taken it in turns to pop into the ward. He liked the way they were keeping the distribution of visits orderly, as if they were rotating their crops. But he didn’t think it was appropriate for any of them to be here, to hear this.
‘Are you okay for us to start off where we got to last time, Mr Ellington?’ PC Doyle asked. He had opened his writing pad at the appropriate place and was ready to start taking notes.
‘If we must.’ Any determination not to be grumpy today had left Clive at approximately 3 a.m.
‘If at any point you want to stop you let me know.’
Clive didn’t want to do this again, but it was his last and only way of helping Nancy. Maybe that was why he was still alive… To ensure that whoever had done this would be caught. He nodded, encouraging PC Doyle to continue.
‘To recap, you returned home from the allotment at approximately ten past three. It was about five minutes later that you realised the back door that leads from the lean-to through to the house was open and this, along with a red stain on the door, alerted you to the fact something was amiss. Is that right?’
Clive nodded again, his throat suddenly dry.
‘You said you heard a buzzing noise. Can you give us a few more details from that point?’
It was hard for Clive to do this when it was this precise point that he didn’t want to think about.
‘I saw something by the breakfast bar. My brain couldn’t fathom what was going on. The thought of it being my Nancy lying on the floor didn’t even enter my head.’ It was hard to explain. It was all a bit jumbled.
‘What did you do next?’
‘I tried to follow the buzzing sound to see what was causing that.’
‘Did you find the cause?’
‘It was the freezer. We have a chest freezer in the hallway. We’ve always needed a big one because of the amount the allotment produces. It means we need the extra freezing space and my produce always sees us through winter.’ Clive realised he was waffling. ‘The lid was open. It was buzzing because it hadn’t been closed properly.’
‘And did you close it? Did you notice anything else unusual?’
At the time, Clive had thought one of them might have forgotten. They’d been having moments like that. Occasionally doing things out of sequence or forgetting part of the process: teabags left at the bottom of a mug, windows open that should have been closed, bills not kept as up to date as usual. They were all tiny mistakes that everyone made now and again, but they seemed to be increasing in their frequency. In that moment, he assumed it was another one of those occasions, but he’d been surprised the noise hadn’t alerted Nancy to the fact sooner.
‘I shut the freezer lid to stop the sound from carrying on. It was stopping me from thinking.’
‘Did you notice anything else unusual? Any other sounds?’
‘There were no other noises.’
‘What did you do after that?’
‘I started looking for her. I popped my nose into the lounge. Then into the dining room, then into the kitchen to check there wasn’t a note. That’s when I found her.’
This was the part that Clive didn’t want to go into. It was already choking him up just thinking about it. He glanced around the room and no one was able to look him in the eye other than Keisha, the girl who’d run away when he wanted to dance. He held her gaze and she didn’t break away. It was nice to know at least one person was brave enough to hear his report. That she was here for the story, not the clues it gave.
‘What did you notice when you found her?’
‘The blood.’ Clive put his hand to his mouth, not wanting to say more. His first thoughts had been of