The Matter of a Marquess - Jess Michaels Page 0,65

I fought through enormous physical pain, that I cannot think about what might have been or even what should have been. I can only live in what is. What I went through losing you, during my years in service and after I was injured…it’s made me the person I am today. The same is true for you. You wouldn’t be the Aurora here today if it weren’t for the struggle. And the Aurora of today is magnificent. Truly magnificent.”

She looked up at him, cheeks shining with tears, but also lit with what he recognized was love for him. He hadn’t trusted that emotion, not fully, all those years ago. But the man he was today saw it and felt it and knew it to be true. He also knew it might not matter, it might not change anything, it might not mean a happy ending for them.

“We can’t change what happened,” she whispered.

“No.”

She bent her head. “I-I suppose you’re right. But I’m still sorry it happened. You have to let me be sorry that any of it happened.”

He kissed her cheek, tasting the salt of her tears. “You can be sorry for as long as you need to be.”

She wrapped her arms around him, and for a moment they just held each other. She took deep breaths and he found himself matching them until he felt calmer. More at peace despite the horrifying truth they’d just uncovered.

“They’ll be meeting downstairs soon,” she whispered. “I should get ready.”

He nodded as he pressed a kiss to her hair. “I should, too. Can we talk about this more later, Aurora?”

“Of course,” she said, but her tone was flat. Her faith had been shaken, perhaps more than his, because it was her father who had ripped her life away. She hadn’t thought him capable, even if Nicholas had.

But that didn’t mean he didn’t have questions that needed answers.

He tilted her chin up and kissed her. She clung to his arms, desperation in her kiss. And when they parted, she didn’t look satisfied. He stepped away and slowly dressed in the quiet of the room. No longer a comfortable or companionable quiet. A quiet of heartbreak and regret.

“I’ll see you tonight,” he said at last.

“Yes,” she murmured as she pulled the covers up around herself like a shield. “Tonight.”

He left her even though he felt uneasy about it. But he didn’t go to his room to ready himself. No, he had another destination in mind. One person who might have the answers he needed…assuming that person hadn’t been keeping them secret all these years.

“Did you know?” Nicholas said as he stepped into Robert’s office and slammed the door behind himself.

Robert had been going over some papers, Derrick standing behind him, looking over his shoulder, and both men glanced up. “What?”

“Did you fucking know about Aurora?” He hated that his voice was shaking. “About what our…your father did?”

“Calm yourself,” Robert said as he got to his feet and exchanged a side glance with Derrick, who shrugged. “What are you so upset about?”

“Nine years ago I believed Aurora had chosen a title over me,” he panted, the weight of it hitting him all over again. “And today I found out that wasn’t true. Her father lied to us both. He manipulated the situation and made her think I chose the army over her, made me believe she wanted a title more. And it sounds as though the last Duke of Roseford might have been party to the deception. Did you know?”

The color bled from Robert’s face and he looked truly stricken, though Nicholas didn’t know if it was horror over what had been done or that he’d been caught in the thick of it.

“My God, it sounds like something our father would have done,” Robert whispered.

“You must have had his diaries, his records. I know he kept notes about his bastards.” Nicholas could hardly breathe, and he leaned on his cane as he glared at his brother.

Derrick placed a hand on Robert’s shoulder and squeezed lightly before he came around the desk and motioned Nicholas to one of the chairs there. “Sit,” he ordered, and Nicholas barely had a choice because he was shaking so hard, his mind racing so, that his body couldn’t keep up.

For all his words to Aurora about how the past couldn’t be changed, he was overwhelmed at the moment by the pain, the loss, the regret. He sank into the seat, hands trembling.

“You don’t really think that Robert was involved in something