Mastered by the Berserkers (Berserker Brides #8) - Lee Savino Page 0,20

Like the Virgin Mother.”

“Virgin Mother,” Jarl repeated, his face blank.

“Yes. She was pure and good of heart and chosen by God to be the vessel for his only begotten son.”

Jarl squinted at the rafters. “So this Virgin bore your God a son.”

“Yes,” I nodded. “The Virgin Mother.”

“Virgin Mother,” Fenrir repeated slowly. “So she was untouched by a man, but a mother.”

“Yes,” I said, wishing I had paid better attention to the friar when he preached. Fenrir approached with a horn of mead and I was so flustered, I took it.

Jarl waited for me to take a sip before he said, “So she was like you.”

I was so startled I almost dropped the horn. “What?”

“Little mother,” Fenrir said. “You are a mother to all the children who know you.”

“And yet you are untouched by any man.” Jarl smirked at me.

“Is that why you cling to your vows? Do you hope to be a virgin mother, like your goddess?” Fenrir asked.

“No. I am nothing like her. I am a sinner, poor and lowly.” Why had I thought I could explain? The abbess would whip me if she heard my feeble attempts at theology. She’d spit with rage, It is not for the likes of you to understand.

“Then why, Juliet?” Jarl wasn’t smirking anymore. He leaned forward, intently focused on me. “Why did you make the vow?”

“I don’t know,” I whispered.

The two warrior’s brows furrowed in unison. I wasn’t making sense. I was losing them.

“I mean, I-I wanted to,” I stammered. “I wanted to be good. I wanted to be safe.”

“Safe,” Fenrir echoed and nodded. “That is why you cling to your beliefs.”

I dropped the horn and it clattered to the ground. I pressed my hands to my ears. “Kyrie eleison. Christos eleison.”

“Juliet. Juliet.” Gentle hands came to mine. They tugged lightly and I resisted but in the end my hands were captured in ones much larger than mine. I gazed into Fenrir’s golden eyes. “Stop. Hush now. We are not angry with you. We seek only to understand.”

I licked my lips. I was so hot, and my mouth was dry. My mouth still moved, forming shapeless prayers.

“How can she make us understand? She doesn’t understand herself,” Jarl muttered.

Fenrir growled in his direction. Jarl shot out of his seat and started pacing.

“I didn’t mean that, Juliet,” he said, running his hand through his hair so it stood up. “I meant only the things you were taught have no meaning, other than what you give them.”

I was too shocked not to answer. “Are you saying there are no gods?”

Fenrir sighed deeply. Jarl rubbed the back of his neck.

“No,” Jarl said. “That is, I do not deny the gods. But they never have granted me favor. Why should I give them more than their due?”

Fenrir pulled me into his arms, and I was too shocked to stop him. “Ignore him,” he advised. “He is angry because the gods never answered his prayers.”

“I never prayed to them,” Jarl snapped.

“Your mother’s prayers, then,” Fenrir corrected patiently, and this time Jarl growled.

“Do not speak of my mother. I have never spoken of her to you.” Jarl’s eyes flared bright. Tension hung in the air between both warriors. I shifted uneasily on Fenrir’s lap and his arms locked around me.

“You didn’t have to.” Fenrir’s voice was still mild as he spoke to his warrior brother. He shifted me in his lap to explain, “We share memories.”

“Is that the magic?” I asked, too overcome with curiosity to stop myself.

“It’s the curse,” Jarl said. He smacked the doorframe and walked out of the lodge. The tension leaked out of me, but the lodge felt strangely empty with him gone.

“We can speak mind to mind,” Fenrir said. “And share thoughts, dreams. Sometimes memories, though not always intentionally. The connection comes unbidden. And then, yes, it does seem like a curse.” He eased me into a new position on his lap, facing him. “Why did you take the vows, Juliet?”

“I thought it was what I wanted. I was an orphan, with no family. My mother’s family gave me to the nuns when I was a few years old. I knew nothing but the abbey.”

Fenrir listened patiently. He looked at me with such calm and a hint of something else—tenderness?—I could not meet his eyes.

I dropped my gaze to my lap. “When I came of age, I begged to stay. I promised to work hard and help take care of the orphans. I love the girls like sisters, for they were the only family