Just because I know he’d really appreciate it and it would be less confusing.”
He stared at me for a long time. “Isn’t there a song about this? I’ll do anything, but not that?”
I laughed, heading into the house. “It was worth a shot. Want to watch a little TV?”
“Only if I don’t have to sit on the fart blanket. Your dad thunders the whole house. That blanket is under some serious stress. How it hasn’t put up the white flag, I do not know.”
I laughed harder, feeling my mom stir, and dragged Austin in behind me. I felt like a kid again. Like a teen sneaking a date into the house. The outcome wouldn’t be the same, but I would take it while I had it, because I had a feeling that come tomorrow I’d be fighting for my house and my freedom once again.
Seventeen
The head looming over me in the dim lighting wasn’t the one I was used to seeing upon first waking up. Before registering anything else about the figure, I screamed and threw up my hands, blasting the intruder up and away. He or she hit the door, across the room, which was closed, and crashed through it, tumbling through the hall in a rush of splintered wood.
I jumped up onto the bed like some sort of ninja, braced myself in the slinky little negligee I’d wanted to wear to bed after my date with Austin, and prepared for battle, all within the space of seconds. I’d really taken all the danger and training to heart. Muscle memory was a beautiful thing.
Austin rushed out of his room in his birthday suit, glancing my way first. When he saw I was ready for action, he shifted his attention to the trespasser, slowly getting up off the ground with a raised hand. More naked men filed into the hall—the other gargoyles had heard the commotion and come to help. Then my father showed up, his nude form standing out in a hallway full of them. He was also the only one who’d brought a weapon to a naked party.
“What’s going on?” my dad hollered, holding Jake the battle-axe across his torso. “It’s two in the morning, for Christ’s sake.”
It had unfortunately taken me that long to identify the person who’d invaded my slumber. The hunched figure slowly rising with the trembling, outstretched hand, silently asking for a truce, was poor Edgar.
“Dad, put some clothes on,” I said, getting down off the bed.
“Why me?” Dad asked, gesturing around him.
“This is my house. I make the rules.”
“You didn’t adhere to my rules; I don’t have to adhere to yours.” He held the battle-axe a little tighter.
“And where did you get that battle-axe?” I demanded. “Put Jake back. You shouldn’t have that.”
“At least someone thought to bring a weapon,” my dad said.
“He does have a point,” Ulric said with a grin. “What’s going on, Jessie?”
“Nothing.” I surveyed my ruined door, one set of hinges still on and the other torn free. “Edgar surprised me, is all.”
“Holy crap.” Ulric widened his eyes. “If this is what happens when someone surprises you, I count myself lucky to be on your side.”
“We’re good, everyone. Go back to your tasks,” Austin said, helping Edgar up. The gargoyles peeled away slowly, heading off to sleep or keep watch out the windows.
“Miss.” Mr. Tom turned the corner at the other end of the hall, appearing behind my dad, perfectly dressed like he was ready for the day. “Shall I get you some coffee?”
“Why weren’t you here earlier?” Austin asked Mr. Tom, a growl riding his words. “She could’ve been in danger.”
“I knew it was Edgar who had surprised her, and I’ve personally experienced what happens to anyone who surprises her out of her sleep. It’s nice to know she has taken it easy on me in the past, and that she is comfortable with me now. Edgar, you have a bone popping out. That’s not a good look.”
“Yeah, my arm hurts a little.” Edgar stuck out his right arm, his left still raised in surrender. A shard stuck out of his forearm, and I turned away and gagged. I never would’ve made it as a nurse, something I’d known for a long time, and this new life constantly reminded me of that fact.
“Oh my God, I am so sorry, Edgar.” I immediately sent a stream of magic to repair the damage.
“What’s that?” My dad crept closer to Edgar. “Oh wow, yes, that doesn’t look good. We need to