she understood, and he’d been raised by Celeste. He had no real-life examples of what a husband was, except for maybe friends and other family members he might have seen. Did they act like this with their wives? Was it just a Mafia thing to be such a… dick?
She hated to think of him like that, but the way he’d come in here, fucked her, then left her, was kind of dickish. It wasn’t like she had a choice in the matter, though. She had no education, no job to support herself, and no hope of ever having the kind of comfort he could give her, at least monetarily. But was money worth being treated like this?
It wasn’t the sex that bothered her, she decided, she quite enjoyed that part. It was the way he’d just walk away from her when it was done. It was the fact that he didn’t hold her just for comfort anymore, talk to her, or tell her his secrets, that really bothered her. She wanted the intimacy that came from more than just sex, but he wasn’t willing to give it to her. Not yet.
Maybe this trust thing was a two-way street. Maybe, if she wanted this to work, she’d have to make an effort to show him that she could be trusted? That she could be a comfort to him in more ways than one?
Earlier she’d thought about how she should be the one in control. And maybe she should be, but first, she’d have to earn his trust. Then, she could learn from him. Learn and make notes, plot a way to make this all work in both their favors.
She didn’t hate him, she never had, even when he’d revealed the truth to her. She’d been hurt by him, yes, very deeply, but it wasn’t a wound that would never heal. Someone had hurt him, though, the way her momma had tried to hurt her. For years Ruby had tried to make her daughter feel like a mongrel, some unloved and unwanted dog. Those efforts had only made Marie hungry for love, not unwilling to take it.
She wasn’t sure she was worthy to be the queen of anything, except someone’s heart, her mother had got to her that much. Sometimes, she felt afraid, cowed by the world outside, but she never felt like that with Matteo. She’d always felt… safe, with him near. Even when he had that hard look in his eyes, just before he told her to bend over or open up for him.
She might not be educated, she decided, but she knew an injured animal when she saw one. She knew when someone was afraid of being hurt, knew it well, and Matteo was worse off than she was. What had happened to him?
The need to know became uppermost in her mind, but she wouldn’t ask him. She had no idea how she’d find out, but she’d find a way, somehow. She was determined to, for him, for them both. She got up from the toilet and walked into the bedroom they shared when they slept. He was in bed, already asleep.
He turned to her in his sleep and she felt his cock, hard and ready all over again. Even in his sleep, he wanted her. With a naughty smile on her face, she slid her hand down his abdomen, down to that hot flesh that she craved so very much. At first, she simply placed her palm over him, absorbed the sensation of holding him there, of knowing that he was thinking about her, even in his sleep.
She felt a pulse go through him and her hand tightened around him through the flannel pants he had on. She heard a soft moan and looked over at him. His eyes were closed, his breath even, he was probably still asleep. She’d never done this before, touched him so intimately while he was asleep and it felt… good.
He wasn’t the guarded man that only allowed her to see what he wanted her to see. He wasn’t the man in control. He was simply a man that enjoyed her touch. Unguarded and soft, well, most of him, she thought with a silent laugh. She knew she should probably stop and let him sleep, and a moment of indecision made her bite at her lip before she decided to find out what would happen.
Would he stay asleep, or would he wake up if she continued?