Mafia Casanova - M. Robinson Page 0,79

sad.

Upset.

Heartbroken.

I wanted to be the man she deserved.

The father Naz needed.

I yearned to be with him.

My loves.

My whole world.

My family.

She smiled. “I know.”

“I’m sorry for everything, Red.”

She looked down, then reached for my hands. I questioned if she saw blood there like I did despite the millions of times I’d cleaned them.

Did she see the souls I’d taken?

Did she know these very hands strangled the life out of the man that was out to kill her?

Did it matter?

It did.

It always did.

Because it was Eden.

And everything she thought mattered.

Slowly, she lifted my hands to her face, cupping her cheeks as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I missed this.”

“Can I ask you something?”

She tilted her head. “Maybe…”

“Did I hurt you? That night?”

“What night?”

“When I ruined both of our lives and tried to push you out of my heart, my soul. Did I hurt you?” I searched her eyes for any hint of emotion. Hating myself that I didn’t know at the time that I had selfishly fucked her, knowing I was losing her. I didn’t think at all to take my time to truly cherish the only woman I wanted to cherish.

To love.

To own.

For now and forever.

Her face flushed. “N-no. I mean, yes… at first it hurt, but I didn’t want to tell you, not when I finally had…” She averted her eyes. “Not when I finally had you. Not when I’d waited so long to taste your kiss. Feel your hands on me. Your dick inside of me. That night at the bar when you became captain all those years ago and you left me with Tristian. It was you I wanted to take me home. It was you I wanted to start a relationship with. It’s always been you. I’ve loved you my entire life, Romeo Sinacore. I knew what you were doing; I could see it in your eyes.” She lifted her face and pinned my gaze with hers. “I think that’s what hurt the most, how easily you gave me up. Gave me away.”

These confessions were breaking my heart. I had to remind myself we were long past that, and she was in my arms. I made so many mistakes, and I was sure I wasn’t done making them.

But for her.

For Eden.

My girl.

My Red.

The mother of my child.

I’d try to not fuck it up.

I waited too long for her.

This was always how we were meant to be.

Together.

No matter what life would throw at us.

“I survived six years off the way I felt when I was inside of you, Eden.” My voice cracked as I slowly pushed her down against the couch, my body hovering over hers. “But somehow, in these last few minutes, I’ve forgotten the way my ex-best friend used to feel, I forgot the way you used to press up against me, and I think I need reminding of why it was so hard to push you away in the first place…”

Her body trembled beneath mine. “Because I’m addicted to a Casanova like you?”

“No… because I’m a sinner, stumbling, bleeding into the garden of Eden, it’s the only place I find my salvation… In you.”

Tears welled in her eyes, and I lowered my mouth, pressing a brief kiss against her lips. “I lied that night I took your virginity, and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my whole life.”

I spoke my final truth against her mouth, “I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I always will.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

“See, madness, as you know is like gravity, all it takes is a little push.” —Heath Ledger’s, The Joker

Eden

It didn’t feel real, the words he said, the way his lips felt against mine. He finally said the words I’d been dying to hear my entire life.

I used to dream about this.

When things were bad, I’d imagine Romeo storming into our home, taking Naz and me away, telling me he was wrong.

That he’d been wrong.

I was his.

I had only ever been his.

We’d kiss.

And life wouldn’t hurt so much anymore.

I wouldn’t flinch in fear whenever Tristian gave me a condescending look of hatred for not being good enough. For not being what he needed.

Wanted.

Couldn’t live without.

Romeo’s eyes searched mine; he was asking a question without speaking.

I answered without even breathing as I pressed my mouth against his, parting my lips, inviting him in, welcoming him home.

To me.

To us.

We were finally one again, and there was no place I’d rather be than in this moment lost with him.

In him.

He was my everything.

This felt