first time it happens, May pulls her head back, surprise passing across her face like she’s reminded of something she’d rather forget.
Lucy’s audition ends a short while later, and she starts gathering her things. Conor circles her like a hawk. May is stirring next to me, and I panic, trying to figure out a way to make this last longer. Moments when I feel comfortable with another person are so rare these days.
“Are you guys taking off?” I struggle to keep my voice casual, to keep the desperation out, and only sort of succeed.
May looks up at Lucy, who’s standing next to the band’s drum set, holding her sticks, head thrown back, laughing at something Conor said. May turns to me and rolls her eyes.
“Yeah. Whenever she’s ready, I guess.”
I swallow, trying to think of something that might make the moment last longer, but before I can, Lucy’s walking toward us.
“May, you ready to head out?”
May peeks at me out of the corner of her eye and I swear there’s a question there, but as usual, I’m mute. She turns back to Lucy and shrugs. “Yeah, let’s go.”
She stands and I push myself off the couch, struggle to come up with something entertaining to say, something that will make her stay, but the words that come out of my mouth when I’m finally upright are “Cool to meet you, you know, officially. See you in class.”
And then they’re gone, walking away, and I’m left beating myself up for being such a wimp.
* * *
—
Auditions end a little while later. Watching some of the other drummers play after Lucy is like having the insides of my ears cleaned with a jagged metal pin.
I head over to Conor. “So. Obvious who you’re going to pick for the band, huh?”
“Dude. That girl…” He shakes his head. “I’ve never been so turned on in my life.”
I roll my eyes. “She was pretty fantastic, for sure.”
He nudges me with his elbow. “Hey—I saw you talking to her friend. What’s her deal? She looked a little…angry.”
“Nah, she’s cool. She’s in my drama class.”
“No shit? I didn’t even know they went to our school until Lucy said something. Why have we never seen them around?”
“I’ll tell you why.” Matt appears at Conor’s elbow, wearing his shit-eating grin. My entire body tenses. “They transferred in from Carter last semester.”
My face flushes. There’s only one way he can be heading with this line of conversation: to jab me yet again with some snide comment about my mom.
Conor shoots Matt a vicious glare, but Matt’s undeterred, per usual. “Awkward, huh, Zach?”
I shrug; try to play it off, like I already knew. “Nah. Why would it be? It’s fine.” My stomach is sinking into my knees, though, and I know it’s not fine. It’s not fine at all.
“Oh really?” Matt smirks. “Well, how about this, then. Do ya know who the girl is you were talking to?”
I hate to be one down in Matt’s presence, so I shrug. “Yeah, her name is May. We have drama together. She told me she used to go to Carter.” Total lie, but to a shark like Matt, cluelessness smells like blood. And he’s already circling.
He snorts. “Doubt that.”
I give him a dirty look. “Why? She did. It’s not a secret, is it?”
He lets out this mean little laugh. “Probably not, but I’d wager she wouldn’t bring it up in casual conversation.” I’m silent, waiting for the other shoe to drop. With Matt, there’s always another shoe waiting to drop on my head and crush me into a million pieces. He continues, “Did she happen to tell you her last name? Or her brother’s name?”
The pit in my stomach grows wider with each word that leaves his mouth.
“No.” It comes out as a mumble.
“Didn’t think so, man.” He snorts. “That girl is May McGintee. I assume you’ve heard of her brother? Jordan McGintee? That super-genius kid