Love In Slow Motion (Love Beyond Measure #2) - E.M. Lindsey Page 0,91

it.”

Fredric wanted to lean in, but not yet. “I should go get Bas. Do you want to come with me or wait inside?”

“I’ll come,” he said, “if you don’t mind the company.”

Fredric took Ilan’s hand off his waist and brought it to his lips, pressing a kiss to his palm. “I never mind yours.”

Swearing under his breath, Ilan twisted his hand away, but only to take Fredric’s, and he hung back as Fredric made his way over the driveway, along the sidewalk, and then up the sharp turn toward Agatha’s door. His cane kept him from tripping over the step, and it found the edge of her doorstop where he came to a halt.

“Are there lights on?”

“A couple,” Ilan said. “It’s not late, it just feels like it.”

Winter always felt like it—long, lingering nights and sharpness on the ocean breeze. It made him want to curl up and let go of everything bothering him, even more now with Ilan standing close enough Fredric could feel his body heat.

His hand found the bell, and he waited with a little bit of anxiety at the base of his spine, because all he wanted was to get Bas inside so they could get on with what he knew was coming next. He took a single step back when he heard footsteps, and then he heard Teddy’s voice as the door opened.

“Hey, I…oh. Sorry, hi.”

Fredric managed a smile. “Hi, sorry we’re a bit late.”

“You’re not at all,” Teddy said as Fredric felt Bas rush forward to nudge his hand. “He heard your car pull up, and he’s been standing at the door waiting.”

Fredric felt a small surge of guilt, though he knew perfectly well Sebastian had been treated like a prince while he was away. All the same, he crouched down and nuzzled his face into his soft fur. “Such a good boy. Thanks for keeping an eye on him,” he added as he pushed himself back up to stand. He felt down and grabbed Bas’ leash, then wrapped it around his wrist. “I hope you don’t mind if we don’t hang out.”

“Oh,” Teddy said, his voice dripping with glee, “I definitely didn’t think you would. Give Agatha a call tomorrow when you have time.”

Fredric heard Ilan snort, and he reached back to smack his arm with the back of his hand. “I will. Thank you again.” He took Bas’ leash and handed it off to Ilan before putting his cane in front of him and starting ahead.

Ilan sputtered with another laugh and caught up quickly. “Don’t be pissy. That was cute.”

“He thinks we’re going to have sex,” Fredric said, and saying the words made it feel so real. Nerves struck suddenly, and his breathing felt a little tight, because he was entirely and completely out of his depth. He wanted to be good—he wanted to make Ilan feel good—but this first could be so, so bad.

“You look like you’re panicking,” Ilan said, and his hand gently brushed against Fredric’s lower back as they came to a stop at his door.

His fingers fumbled with the keys and the lock for a second, but eventually he got it open, and Ilan let Bas off the lead. The sound of the leather hitting the coatrack was a little bit final, and Fredric gave his lips a nervous lick.

“Will you talk to me?” Ilan asked.

Fredric bowed his head and rubbed at his left eye. “I want you. I think that’s obvious. I hope it’s obvious.”

Ilan let out a small hum and stepped in close, one hand going up to the back of Fredric’s neck. His fingers swirled in abstract, gentle shapes, and in spite of himself, he relaxed a fraction. “Yes,” he said, and let his lips brush up against Fredric’s jaw, “it’s obvious.”

Fredric couldn’t stop a small groan, and Ilan wrapped both arms around him, pulling him tight. “I want this to be good for you.”

“It will be,” Ilan said, and Fredric couldn’t help a small, bitter laugh.

“But,” he said with quiet protest, “what if it isn’t? I haven’t done this with a man before. I haven’t done this at all in years—more than I can count.” He tried to pull away, but the effort was half-hearted, and Ilan didn’t let him get far. “It probably won’t compare to what you’re used to.”

Warm hands framed his face, and Fredric couldn’t stop himself from leaning into a large palm. “You’re right. It could never compare.” Before his heart could shatter, Ilan leaned in and rubbed his nose