‘Maybe I’m having to toughen up.’ I shrug. ‘We’ve been apart now for quite a while. It’s been hard.’ My voice catches, annoyingly.
‘I know, Soph,’ she says, softening, ‘and you’ve done amazingly. I don’t know anyone else who would cope with what you have, and look at you. You’ve totally changed careers, the kids love you, you’ve kept going, you’ve helped me with the wedding, been helping everyone out during this lockdown. But maybe it’s time for you to think of you and no one else. This is your life. You deserve to be happy.’
‘I know and I think I’ve come to a decision.’
‘That’s wonderful! So have you told Ryan?’
‘No, not yet. He said he’d give me some time to think about everything.’
‘Phone him now,’ she encourages. ‘We can finish the pics another time. I thought I’d do a slideshow of some of them. Also, I was thinking …’
‘Yeah?’
‘I don’t know what you think, but I was planning a wedding do after lockdown.’
‘What? Another wedding?’ I’m filled with horror.
‘No not another wedding; just a post wedding, wedding celebration.’
‘Jess,’ I shriek.
‘What?’ she asks innocently.
‘You really are something else!’
Once I’ve finally finished the Zoom call with Jess I wander bemusedly out onto the balcony. ‘Jack?’ I call as I can feel he might be up there. It’s a beautiful day and he often sits on the balcony in the middle of the day and when I’m not working we sit and chat over lunch.
‘Hey, Sophia,’ he answers. ‘How’s it going?’
‘It’s going!’ I groan. ‘You’re never going to guess what?’
‘What?’
‘Jess is planning another wedding celebration for after lockdown.’
‘Just one more?’ Jack teases.
‘I’m not sure I can cope.’
‘What does Zach say?’
‘I expect he’ll try to talk her out of it … and then give in gracefully!’
‘He sounds a wise man.’
‘Yeah right!’ I laugh. ‘Anyway, I do have some good news. Elsie’s writing box is ready so I’m picking it up on my way back from the shopping trip this afternoon and I’ve arranged to take it round to Bertie, with the letter back where it should be.’
‘That’s great. Does it look good?’
‘Chris says he’s pretty pleased with it. I can’t wait to see Bertie’s face, although I’m not sure how to best support him with the letter. He’s still not sure whether to call Flora or not.’
‘No.’ Jack pauses for a moment. ‘How about I text Mavis to come along?’
‘Mavis?’ I ask. ‘Why?’
‘I don’t know, I just feel as though she could be someone to have around as he opens it.’
‘I was thinking of being there.’
‘Oh – what time will you be back?’ He sounds disappointed.
‘I don’t know,’ I say, ‘probably by eight. Why?’
‘I’ve got something I wanted to talk to you about this evening.’
‘Sounds serious.’
‘No, well at least I hope it’s a good thing. Say about 9 p.m.?’
‘Okay, that’s fine. We normally chat then anyway.’
‘I know, I was just checking you were available.’
‘Oh. I’m feeling nervous now,’ I say, trying to laugh it off.
‘You don’t need to be.’
‘I’ll take your word for it.’
‘’Til later then,’ Jack says.
‘Okay … bye.’
‘Bye.’
There’s a pause.
‘Are you still there?’ he asks.
‘Yes are you?’ I answer.
‘Yes.’
‘Okay I’m going now then.’
‘Me too.’ I listen and can tell he’s listening too.
‘Okay, let’s go in at the same time,’ I tell him, laughing at the absurdity of it.
‘On the count of three.’
‘Okay, one, two …’
‘Three …’ he says, and I hear him pull the door shut upstairs at the same time as me. I smile and wander into the flat. What on earth is he up to this time?
I don’t have much time to think on it any more as I have to go and pick up Elsie’s case on the way back from the weekly shop so I don’t break any rules by going out on an unnecessary trip. The supermarket is a complete nightmare as I was obediently following the one-way system, as always, then realised I had forgotten something on the shelf a few metres back. With a woman and her trolley right behind me I had no choice but to go all round the shop again and by that time, I’d forgotten what it was I was trying to buy.
Finally after this shopping ordeal (when did it ever get so complicated?), I manage to get to Chris’s house – thank goodness he’s all ready for me, bringing the case out and placing it on the seat outside his house and stepping back for me to look at it. It’s tiny and he’s quite