For the Love of Ivy - Cindy Kirk Page 0,15

in his voice, saw it in his eyes. “Sounds like an incredible woman.”

“Jan always knew exactly what she wanted out of life.” A smile lifted the corners of Seth’s lips. “She was a great wife and mother.”

Lauren felt a twinge of envy. The more he shared, the more it became clear that if Seth ever remarried that woman would have some pretty big shoes to fill.

“I’m not saying she was perfect,” Seth added as if he could read her thoughts. “The fact that she always knew what she wanted sometimes made it hard for her to understand those of us who weren’t so sure.”

Lauren’s ears pricked up. Seth had experienced career indecision?

“I struggled with what I wanted to be when I was growing up,” Lauren said as she drew an imaginary figure eight on the tabletop with her finger, remembering the strained silence that would fill the house whenever she suggested something that didn’t meet with her parents’ approval. “I remember one time...I mentioned to my father I was considering getting a business degree and going into market research. He didn’t speak to me for days.”

“Yeah, right. No one would—” Seth stopped. “You’re serious.”

Lauren nodded.

“No offense to your dad, but what’s wrong with that career?”

“Not prestigious enough. My father is a world- renowned mathematician. To him, market research is more art than science,” Lauren said. “More important, it wasn’t a field he’d chosen for me. Right off that made it unacceptable.”

“Nice guy.”

“I ended up falling in love with psychology. He liked that even less, but I let him rant.” Lauren smiled. “What about your parents? Would they have been okay with you becoming something other than a rancher?”

Seth thought for a moment. “I think so.”

“Ranching was in your blood.” Lauren kept her tone light. “Right?”

“The land, this part of the country, is a part of me. I struggled with the expectation that I would become a full-time rancher.” The distant look returned to Seth’s eyes. “From the time I was Ivy’s age, I wanted to be a large-animal vet.”

“Why didn’t you do it?” Responding to the passion in his voice, Lauren pushed her cup aside. She leaned forward and rested her elbows on the table.

“I was actually in my third year of vet school when my father started having health issues. Then he and my mother decided to move to Florida right around the time Jan discovered she was pregnant. It was clear my place was here, not in Bozeman.”

“I didn’t know you were married in college.” Lauren wondered how she could have missed that part of the story.

“We were dating but not married.” Seth’s voice was even and well controlled. His expression gave nothing away. “Jan had some health concerns early in the pregnancy. She wasn’t keen on being away from her folks. When my parents decided to relocate, it made sense for me to move back.”

“You only had a year left.” Lauren did her best to hide her shock. “You gave up your dream when you were so close.”

“I suppose that’s one way to look at it.” Seth shrugged. “I prefer to view it as trading one dream for another. Jan and Ivy and the land were what I wanted, too.”

Lauren stared in amazement. There wasn’t an ounce of bitterness or regret in Seth’s voice. Jan had been one lucky woman.

“Enough about me.” Seth lifted a hand in a dismissive wave. ‘Tell me about you.”

Though she’d barely scratched the surface on what made Seth tick, his tone made it clear he wouldn’t welcome any more questions about himself. She got the distinct impression he regretted saying as much as he had.

“Not much to tell.” Lauren thought for a moment. “I already told you about my parents’ commuter marriage and their commitment to their careers. They weren’t planning on children, but my mom’s IUD failed. She made sure they wouldn’t be surprised again. She had her tubes tied right after I was born.”

Seth’s gaze searched her face. “Unexpected or not, they must be very proud of you.”

“They have pretty high standards." Lauren spoke evenly, ignoring the dagger of pain lancing her heart.

According to her parents she’d done a lot of things right and more than a few wrong. They hadn’t understood why she’d pursued her PhD on a part-time basis instead of hitting it full-time. Hadn’t seen that teaching at the community-college level for several years had honed her classroom presentation skills and counseling patients had broadened her appreciation for the knowledge gained in her doctoral studies.

“From your description,