Love Him Free (On the Market #1) - E.M. Lindsey Page 0,41
done about my shop. When the Motel brothers took over the Lodge, Levi got a contract with them to provide breads and pastries for their morning buffet—and it helps, but we’re still taking a loss every month. I haven’t told Levi. I don’t want him to think everything he worked towards was for nothing.’
Rocco bit his lip. ‘He’s going to be angry.’
‘Yes.’ Simon’s fist nodded and his face showed nothing but resignation. ‘Maybe. He got James out of it. But, there’s nothing I can do. All I want is to know I can get out from under this loan and close the shop without having to sell everything I own and live in my car.’
Rocco would have turned over every cent in his savings right then—or at least, most of it. But he knew men like Simon, knew he would never accept it. ‘You could make porn.’
Simon’s eyes widened, and the blush spread to his ears and throat. ‘I can’t even kiss you without coming!’
“Bah!” Rocco waved him off. He’d meant it as a joke, just something to lighten the mood—but it occurred to him, that’s how he got started. A random frat boy at a college party said gay porn made good money. At that point, Rocco was broke and more than happy to try getting off for a little cash. Rocco started out in amateur videos, but it wasn’t long before people took notice.
Rocco had been doing this a long time now, and he damn well knew people would pay to watch Simon get off, to come all over himself without being touched. For a brief, furious second, he pictured another man touching Simon, and he felt his entire body grow hot as fire with possession and jealousy. He didn’t want anyone touching Simon other than himself, and he didn’t care that his job made him a hypocrite.
‘Wait,’ he signed, and Simon stared at him. ‘Make a video with me.’
Simon blinked. ‘With you?’
‘There are amateur sites all over the internet. We could film here. People would pay a ton of cash to watch you come just from being kissed.’
Simon’s blush was so deep, he almost looked tan. ‘I can’t.’
Rocco held up his hands in surrender. ‘Okay. That’s fine. It is. I’d never push you into doing something you find wrong.’
Simon’s eyes went wide, and he shook his head. ‘No. No. I don’t think porn is wrong. I…I’ve been your fan since,’ he glanced away and looked vaguely embarrassed before looking back and giving Rocco a stern frown. ‘For a long time. I don’t think what you do is wrong. I just don’t think anyone wants to watch someone like me. I mean, look at me.’
Rocco felt heat creep into his eyes. ‘I am. I want to watch you fall apart under my hands.’
Simon’s swallow was thick enough, Rocco saw it stick. ‘Why?’
Unable to stop himself, Rocco traced just beneath Simon’s lower lip, watching the way his mouth opened to let breath escape. He felt it, hot and humid against the pads of his fingers. ‘You’re beautiful.’ Simon lifted his hands to protest, but Rocco wouldn’t let him. ‘You are beautiful. And you deserve to be worshipped.’
He wasn’t sure if that was blasphemy to Simon. His family was staunchly Catholic, but Rocco had never put much stock in religion, and he didn’t understand a lot of Simon’s. But it was hard to care when he wanted him this much.
‘What would…what would the videos be like?’ Simon finally asked. There was a faint tremble in his fingers, but his expression held unexpected determination in his eyes.
Rocco didn’t need to think about what they’d be like—he knew. He’d been fantasizing since the night he left Simon, come in his pants, standing in his doorway. ‘I’d lay you down, strip you slowly. I’d kiss your neck and nowhere else until you let go.’
Simon shuddered. ‘Just that?’
Rocco shook his head. He ached to put his hands on Simon again, but he refrained. ‘I’d touch you. I’d drag fingertips up and down your thighs until you couldn’t hold it in. Maybe in another, I wouldn’t touch you at all—maybe I’d just speak to you.’
Simon’s head fell back, and his lips were parted as he took several breaths. ‘I’m close.’
‘I know,’ Rocco said when Simon opened his eyes again—because he did. It had only happened twice, but he already recognized the signs in Simon’s body. ‘I can stop.’
Simon looked him directly in the eyes, then shook his head. ‘Don’t.’