Lord of Chaos (The Dragon Demigods #7) - Charlene Hartnady Page 0,66
I saw them there. My girlfriend, Bella, and my best friend, Warrick, who was all over her. It was hot and heavy, and I saw red.”
I watch as Rage stands. He’s a bundle of nerves and energy. It’s at times like these that I can feel his power. It’s a similar feeling you get if you stand too close to one of those massive speakers at a concert. The air feels charged, displaced somehow. I watch him walk to the other side of the room, his hand squeezing the back of his neck. When he turns, his eyes have this tortured look. He doesn’t feel quite as charged.
He walks back and sits, breathing out through his nose. “I can’t believe how betrayed I felt. We were kids. It was stupid. I lost it. I punched him. I said terrible things, not just about him but about her too.” He sniffs. I can see the emotions simmering beneath the surface. “I didn’t ask what was going on. I didn’t wait for replays. I hit Warrick. I hit my friend, and he retaliated. I deserved it. I was young and so fucking stupid. I got angry. Before I knew it, we were in a full-on punching match. I lost control. I can’t remember what happened next. I’m not sure if I blacked out or if I’ve blocked the memory. When I came to, I was covered in blood. Eight men were holding me down. Several of them were bloody. There were four bodies on the ground.” His voice breaks. I can see him trying to compose himself.
“Three of the men on the floor were badly beaten. They had broken limbs. They were bleeding and seriously hurt. One of them had to fight for his life. It was touch and go for a couple of days. Then there was Warrick…” I see his throat work. He rubs his eyes. “I killed him, Nia. I killed my best friend with my bare hands.” He holds up his hands, looking at them like they’re bloody now. I can see a tortured, haunted look in his eyes.
“It was an accident,” I tell him, my voice is a whisper. No wonder. This poor, tortured soul.
Rage shakes his head. “He was my friend. My best fucking friend. I just lost it. I was a jealous asshole. I found out afterward that Bella had convinced him that we had broken up. I realized that she didn’t care about me. She never had. Either of us, for that matter. I let something so stupid get to me. I killed him over something so trivial. That’s not an accident.” There’s anguish written all over his face. “I let myself get so angry that I lost control. I tore his head…” Rage stops talking. His jaw is tight. He’s breathing fast. He drops his head into his hands, covering his face.
“You were young. You…couldn’t have known that you would lose it. That you would blackout and—”
“It’s no excuse. I knew my powers were huge. I could feel it. Could feel them inside. I should have been more careful. What should have been a fistfight…a busted lip…a torn shirt, and some bruised egos…ended up in tragedy. I should never have been forgiven for what I did. Bella told everyone that I started to glow. Apparently, when I let my powers out, my whole body gets this strange glow. I become a fighting, killing machine. She called me a freak, and she was right.”
“Berserker mode,” I say. “You are the lord of war. You are not a freak.”
“It’s terrible. I’m a fuck up! There’s no thought. No control. No off button. I kill. I do so indiscriminately. I killed my best friend. I would have killed more people if they hadn’t stopped me. They held me down for fifteen minutes. It took eight adult dragon shifters to hold me down long enough for whatever state I was in to pass.”
“I can’t imagine what that must have felt like. What you must have gone through. You’ve never forgiven yourself.” It’s not a question. I’m stating a fact.
“I don’t deserve to be forgiven.”
“You didn’t know it would happen.”
“I could feel it. I can feel the power inside me. It’s simmering beneath the surface. I let it out that day. I was so angry that I let it out, and I did the unforgivable.”
“You said that you were forgiven, though. I’m sure there’s a reason for that.” I try.
He nods, “I wasn’t persecuted. I wasn’t sentenced to