He frowned at that. He knew how painful the arousal could become. Could she really keep the stubbornness intact that long?
He smiled slowly, remembering the first time, how she had pleaded so sweetly, so heatedly.
“No.”
Strangely, a look of hurt passed across her face, as though he had wounded her with that one word.
“I’m not hungry,” she said then and turned for the door, swinging it open forcibly before stalking out to the porch, and God only knew how much further.
He stared at the opened door in shock. She was in heat, clearly as aroused as she ever had been, and she was walking away from him? He shook his head before following more slowly, curious as to what she thought she was going to do, or where she was going to go.
Two wolves guarded the porch. Amanda stood at the steps, staring down at the animals that watched her with challenging canine expressions. When she glanced back at him, Kiowa nearly winced at the fury reflecting in her eyes.
“Amanda…” He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans and hunched his shoulders defensively. “I cannot stand the thought of the pain you’ll be in. Even for the blood tests alone.”
“It is not your choice,” she snapped, turning away from him and staring down at the wolves. “Tell them to move.”
He breathed in roughly. The woman was going to rip his heart from his chest and she didn’t even see it. Had no concept of the hell she was forcing him to face.
“It’s my place to protect you,” he said softly. “How can I do that if I let you do something that will so clearly cause you such pain?” He shook his head in confusion, fighting the impulses to do as she wished and the instinctive howl of the animal that demanded she know no pain.
“Do you think this arousal doesn’t hurt?” She turned on him then and the scent of her need had lust ripping through his loins. “High and mighty Coyote Kiowa really doesn’t give a f**k though, does he?”
she snarled. “If you don’t get that scientist back up here, for those tests, then you can watch me hurt anyway, Kiowa. And hurt and hurt. Because you will not touch me until I do this.”
“Why is this so important?” He fought the flames of his own anger, the emotion fighting to be free.
“They can’t help you, Amanda. Nothing can break that bond with me no matter how much you wish it.”
“It could create a cure. If nothing else, something that will ease the symptoms,” she argued back. “If not for me, then for someone else.”
“There is no cure needed.” He wanted to bare his teeth in a primal snarl of rage and only barely managed to contain it. “Why are you so desperate to leave me? Isn’t it enough for me to know you don’t want me?”
She gave him a look of incredulity. “You think this is just about you? That I don’t want you? Wouldn’t want you even if weren’t for this heat?” Her lips thinned, her eyes glittering with unshed tears. “Kiowa, I want to know that what I feel, that what I see in you, is more than just a biological urge gone haywire. And if I can’t have it for myself then at least my children will. Now tell those animals to move.” Her voice hardened.
The finger that poked into his chest surprised him, stilling the anger long enough for a germ of amusement to enter. She stood before him like an enraged coyote female, her eyes glittering, her teeth bared in her anger and that little finger braced in his chest.
“What about me? What about the rest of the women who endure this? What if something happened to you, moron?” Her voice rose then, and he saw something akin to fear in her eyes. “What do I do then, Kiowa? How much pain will I endure then?”
“Nothing will happen to me.” He wouldn’t allow it. Not now.
“God, you are so arrogant.” She brought her hands to her head, holding it as though in pain. “Forget it. Just forget plain reason. Read my lips instead. I am not f**king you until I have those tests done.”
“I’ll kill the bastard who hurts you,” he yelled back, consumed by his anger now. “Do you hear me, Amanda? I don’t care, be it male or female, I will not be able to control my fury.”
He was nose to nose with her, forcing himself to hold his hands back to keep from shaking her to make her understand.
“Get over it!” she snapped. “Now get them back up here and then walk away. Go hunting. Hell, go get drunk, I don’t give a damn. But if they aren’t up here in fifteen minutes flat, then those mangy wolves can bite my ass or clear out, because I’m going to that lab and I’ll get the damned things myself.”
Son of a bitch. Dammit. Fuck. His dick was throbbing like a toothache, his instincts were screaming at him to f**k her into silence, but something else was warning him that he wasn’t going to win this fight. It was what he saw in her eyes. It was one of the very things that had drawn him to her to begin with, that spark of determination, of strength.
She had run from him because of his need to protect her, and now she was in his face, snarling back at him, willing to risk even his rage, which she had no idea what it would entail, to do what she felt was right. To do something that could give her the escape from him that he knew she was looking for. He moved back slowly, stilling the pain inside him as he looked down at the wolves.
“Go.” The single order released them from duty and sent them loping back to Dash, wherever he might be. Then he turned to her. “The labs are in the main house,” he said softly. “I can’t go with you, Amanda. As much as you may not believe me, I would kill one of those doctors the first time I heard you cry out.”
He turned and stalked back into the house. The eggs and ham were left on the table as he paced into the bedroom, drawing in her scent, the presence he feared losing in his life. And he forced himself to wait.
* * * * *