A Long Way Back (Unfinished Business #2) - Barbara Elsborg Page 0,96
looked devastated, the lines in his face more pronounced. I’ve done that. I wish I hadn’t.
“A guy called George Milton was appointed my offender manager. Only George and a couple of others in high-up roles knew who I really was and where I was living. My safety depended on them, but there was a breach. I was never told exactly what happened, but a journalist called Ben Carter found me working in a factory in Lancashire and a picture of me was posted on social media. It was taken down fast, but the damage was done. My lifelong anonymity didn’t last long.” He gave a quiet laugh. “A lot of people want me dead even after all this time.”
“Christ.”
“I didn’t put a foot wrong while I was in detention. I worked hard, did as I was told. I was determined to succeed. Though I knew if anyone found out who I was once I was released, I’d have no chance of putting my past behind me, of finding and holding on to a good job, or continuing my education at university, or forming relationships with anyone.
“I can’t have friends. I have to keep moving. I have to lie, or at least avoid answering some questions, and I don’t like lying. I know this is us done now, but I’m glad I’ve told you the truth, even though I’ve broken the one rule that was drummed into me. Never tell anyone who you are.” He huffed. “It would have come out sooner or later, and the later it came out, the worse it would have been, the betrayal too much for either of us to bear. I could have run, but I got to know you too well to walk away without a word.”
He lifted his head and stared at Tay. “I once thought if I was a good boy, all my dreams would come true. I’ve given up on dreams. They only break my heart.”
Tay’s eyes brimmed with tears.
Ink rolled his shoulders, then grimaced in pain. “Carter came to the hospital this morning. I’ve always felt him looking over my shoulder. He’d get into trouble for posting a picture of me, but I seem to have managed that all by myself. One hint about my real name from anyone and… Yeah, well, he’s writing a book and he wants me to tell him my side of everything. I think it’s only a matter of time before people know who I am. What they don’t know, unless you told them, is this address. But I can’t wait until they find out where I am. I can’t stay inside forever. I need to move on. When I’m strong enough to leave, I will. I’m sorry I got you involved. I wish things were different, but they’re not.”
“Where are you going to go?”
“I usually just pick a destination at random.”
“I don’t want you to go.”
Ink bit his lip.
Tay reached for his hand and held it tight. “I mean it.”
“I don’t want to go, but I have to. I’ve had my day in the sun with you—sort of literally—and I don’t want to drag you down into the hell of my world. Not now that you’re just regaining the life you once had. You have everything ahead of you. All the things I wished for when I was locked away, when I wanted to get back into the world, I wish them for you now. Playing in the snow. Feeling sunshine on your face. Surfing. Stargazing. Eclipses. Fireworks. Laughter. Love. I wish you happiness. I wish you life.” Ink’s heart burned.
“I want to spend my life with you.”
Oh. Ink couldn’t let Tay do that. It was too great a sacrifice, but for a moment, he let hope back in.
“I don’t want to say more,” Ink whispered. “I want you to think about what I’ve said. If you’re found to be connected to me, deny you knew who I was. Maybe they won’t leave you alone anyway. They’ll offer you money to tell them your story and what I was like. They’ll twist the truth. All I need is time to get better before you do anything. I’ll leave, but I can’t leave yet. If that’s okay? But if you want me gone right this minute, I understand. I’d be grateful if you’d keep Dog and let me stay until it’s dark.”
“I—”
“Please don’t say anything. Think first about what I’ve said. I’ve opened my heart and now it’s empty. I need to rest for a