in slow motion. Being emotionally blindsided knocks the wind out of a person.
“One more thing, before you go,” Castro says gently. “This might be a good time to reevaluate our goals here.”
Marin pauses, resting her coat in her lap. “What do you mean? My goals haven’t changed.”
“At our last meeting, I told you I’ve been repeating the entire investigation PD did sixteen months ago. Nobody in your inner or outer social circles has flagged as suspicious. I’ve sifted through all of Derek’s past and present employees, his business contacts, your employees, your business contacts, and your entire client roster for the year leading up to Sebastian’s disappearance. The camera footage from the market has been dissected by two different video forensic specialists I hired personally. Nothing new has surfaced. It’s been more than a year now, and we have no new leads.”
Marin suspects what the PI is going to say, and braces herself. Seattle PD and the FBI did a comprehensive search immediately after Sebastian went missing. Their son’s picture was all over the local news within two hours, and his Missing Child poster went viral on Facebook and Twitter the next day. A few days after that, the case had garnered national attention, prompting accusations of classicism and elitism because the authorities appeared to be giving the Machados special treatment. But neither Marin nor Derek could apologize for that. Why not use every advantage they had? What was the point of having money and powerful friends if they couldn’t help in a situation like this? They were desperate to find their son. Any parent would be.
Castro is watching her closely, and Marin forces herself to focus.
“I don’t want to waste your time and money, but I feel like we’ve come to a place where I can say to you…” Castro sighs, and puts her hands in her lap. “I know it doesn’t make any sense at all, and it’s incredibly painful and unfair, but a lot of the time … these kidnappings just aren’t personal.”
Jesus Christ, Marin hates when people say that. It’s the exact same thing the police said. Dr. Chen said it, too. But it doesn’t make it easier to know that it wasn’t personal. It doesn’t help at all to think that her four-year-old child got kidnapped only because he happened to be the kid in closest proximity to the psychopath who stole him.
She doesn’t say any of this to Castro. She keeps it together. The PI is just doing her job.
“You have about twenty-five hundred unused in your retainer,” Castro says. “I’m more than willing to keep going, but I think at this point, you might want to consider—”
“We’re not done.” The strength of Marin’s voice surprises them both. Her throat isn’t dry anymore. She sounds like herself again, decisive and commanding and a total “lady boss,” as Sadie would say. “We’re not even close to being done. I want you to keep looking.”
Their eyes lock. Castro’s face is expressionless, but Marin can picture her mind working, attempting to read her. But she doesn’t say anything, and with every passing second, the weight of what the PI said grows heavier.
“Vanessa,” Marin says, and her voice cracks on the last syllable. “Vanessa, please.”
She’s never used the private investigator’s first name before.
Castro glances at Marin’s ring again. If she isn’t married now, then she was married before. Marin senses it. She probably has kids. Marin senses that, too. Moms recognize other moms—it’s in the lines of their faces, their weariness, their protectiveness, their vulnerability. Marin’s tempted to give the PI her goddamned ring, if only she’ll stay on.
“I know you can’t promise results, and I’ve never expected you to. I just need you to promise you’ll keep doing your best.” Marin is in full boss mode now, speaking to the PI the way she might speak to one of her salon employees, someone who’s highly valued but perhaps requires a little motivation. “What about the affair? Who is this person sleeping with my husband? What is it she really wants? Derek isn’t a celebrity, but he’s in the media often enough. We both are. She has to know who we are, and what we’ve lost. I think she’s worth digging into.”
Marin leans forward. “I understand it’s not possible for you to work on this every minute of every day. I know you have other clients. But whenever you can, whenever you have a spare moment … I need to know that someone is always looking for my