There was concern, confusion, and sadness in her brown eyes, but his silver gaze was directed at Oni, so he didn’t notice. Even if he had, he wouldn’t do anything about it. Not while he was a storm ready to crack open the sky.
“Say another word,” he warned, “and I will end you, Sridhar.”
I glanced at Loren, who noticed and shook his head before his eyes closed even as pride filled them. We both knew it was too late. We knew the kind of woman we fell in love with. She was the kind who took on callous rock stars, public scrutiny, and an unscrupulous label.
All to send a message.
All to inspire.
All to protect one girl’s future and save her from a dire fate.
Braxton believed she’d failed her baby sister. She wouldn’t allow herself to fail us too. She was bold enough to think she could take on that burden and still keep us from reclaiming her heart.
“Then I’ll do it,” she said with an unbreakable finality that made my head fall in defeat. I knew the decision coming, but it still hurt the same. “I’ll finish the goddamn tour.”
“Are you out of your mind?” Griff screamed the second I was done speaking. “Are their cocks really that amazing?”
I was sitting at the bar above our kitchen sink with an open bottle of wine next to me and my head in my hands while I ignored my best friend’s ranting.
Bound was leaving for Europe in three days.
What the hell had I done?
This all felt like déjà vu, except I wasn’t in love with my bandmates when it happened before. It had been hours since the meeting with Savant. I half expected my exes—that felt so weird to say—to corner me in the parking lot after, but they didn’t. I think Houston, Loren, and Jericho shared my shock that I would finish the tour.
Maybe they were even upset?
I didn’t want to dwell on that possibility because it shouldn’t matter, and yet I couldn’t help being hurt by their rejection. I couldn’t erase the last eight months. I couldn’t erase my feelings for them. I’ve been trapped between two realities since walking out on them.
The truth that I’d fallen in love and the fact that we could never be.
I haven’t been okay.
I’d forgotten how to be without them, eat without them, sleep without them. I couldn’t even remember how to string a fucking chord without them. Trust me—I’ve tried to write many a sad song in order to purge these unrelenting thoughts inside my head.
Was Jericho still in love with her?
I couldn’t help but suspect that I had just been something to pass the time. Or perhaps he thought I could be a replacement for his long-lost love until he realized that I could never measure up. We never did get to have that talk. What if that had been what he wanted to tell me? I wasn’t as good as his precious Emily, who had him first, and I never would be.
Jealousy truly was bitter.
I took a sip of my wine to wash away the taste.
“What if Griffin’s right? Maybe you shouldn’t go,” Maeko suggested, pulling me from my spiraling thoughts. It figures she’d take Griff’s side since they were a thing now.
They hadn’t told me.
In fact, they’ve been trying to hide it since I returned. I guess they forgot I knew them too well. Griff and Maeko had taken advantage of my absence and set aflame something that had been kindling all along. Now they didn’t want to crash my sourpuss party with their happy news even though I was happy for them.
On the inside.
Deep down in my darkest depths, the romantic who still believed in love and happy endings but had been stomped to within an inch of her life was over the fucking moon for her best friends.
Yaaaaaay.
I groaned and dropped my forehead on the counter.
I can’t do this.
Maeko had been rubbing my back softly when her hand suddenly stopped mid-stroke. “What are you doing, ba—Griff?”
I snorted softly, and since my head was down, they couldn’t see my smile. It had been a while since I tasted chocolate.
“I’m sending an email to my boss to tell him that I’m cashing in on my vacation days, and then you’re calling yours,” Griff said to Maeko. I could hear her laptop keys clicking as she spoke.
“Okay, but why?”
“Because we’re not leaving her alone with those liars,” she decided as she continued to type.