If one of us lost her, we all did, which meant the chances of us fucking up were greater with three. I wasn’t sure if I could go through losing Braxton a fourth or fifth time. I guess it depended on who was counting.
When I read the same line six times, I gave up and tossed the papers neither Jericho nor Emily had signed, making it crystal clear to Braxton that they were still married.
I couldn’t think straight. Each breath felt like it cost me a little more. I wanted to hit something, namely Jericho.
Seeing that wild look in his eyes that mirrored my own, I knew he’d fuck me up just as bad if I tried. In my peripheral, I noticed Houston sink onto the edge of Braxton’s bed with his forearms on his thighs as he stared dejectedly at the floor.
“Now would be a good time for you to tell us what to do,” I spat.
He ignored me.
I shoved my fingers through my hair before looking around, trying to convince myself that she was really gone. Braxton had taken everything and left nothing behind. Nothing to confirm that she’d ever really been here at all. I wouldn’t be struggling to accept it if I hadn’t fallen for her.
Braxton couldn’t just settle for being an amazing lay and guitarist. She had to go and fuck with my feelings too.
I was out of the bedroom and back in the hall before I even realized my feet were moving. I heard Rich asking me where I was going, but I ignored him. I couldn’t put all of the blame on his shoulders even though I wished I could. I went along with the lie. I kept Braxton in the dark. Now she was gone, and I—
I sent my fist through the wall once I got inside my room and barked a curse when I pulled it away. My hand throbbed and hurt like hell, but the pain wasn’t the worst I was feeling at the moment.
Finding my phone and ignoring my hand, I immediately dialed Braxton. Even though I’d hoped, never in my wildest dreams did I imagine she’d answer.
“Yes, Loren?”
My lips parted, but no words came. None that would make it right. When I heard her sigh, however, I knew the small window I’d been given was quickly closing.
“Come back.”
“Now, why would I do that?” I pictured her studying her nails and wished she’d stayed to use them on me—to inflict pain rather than give me indifference. I could handle one, but she’d destroy me with the other.
“Because I love you,” I told her even though it wasn’t even close to what I had planned to say. I could feel her surprise on the other end, but she masked it well with frigid silence. I gulped. “I hate that I waited until now to tell you. I hate that I can’t see your face because as much as you want to hate me, you wouldn’t be able to hide the truth.”
“What’s the truth?”
“You love me too.” I waited for her to confirm or deny it, but Braxton had returned to giving no reaction at all. I used her silence as the chance to listen to her background and pinpoint her location so I could go fucking get her. It pissed me off that I had zero clue how long ago she’d left because, while she’d been thinking and feeling the worst, I’d been sleeping like a baby. “Please come back,” I begged once more. “We’ll tell you everything. It’s not what you think.”
I heard her quiet chuckle, and my head dropped from the weight of holding it up. I knew before she spoke. I knew that I’d lost her.
“It’s exactly what I think, Loren. I don’t negotiate with liars.”
I was still holding the phone to my ear long after she hung up. It was how Houston and Rich found me when they walked into my room. I was still hoping this was all a bad dream, and I’d wake up soon.
“Get out.” I didn’t look at them after I issued the order. I just pressed my back to the mattress and stared up at the black ceiling.
“We will, but you’re coming with us. Tim’s on his way,” Rich announced, referring to our pilot.
“For what?”
“Braxton was spotted at the airport. It’s all over the blogs.”
I found myself snorting even though I didn’t find a damn thing