Let Me Find Your Omega - Ashe Moon Page 0,52

myself back and get a hold of my feelings. I had to get myself under control. I was a master of my emotions—it was a key skill in being a good reader—and so I needed to resist getting carried away with how I felt about Markos.

But it was so hard. This ache in my chest was something brand new, and it felt like he was always on the edge of every thought, knocking on the door of my mind. I wanted to let him in. I wanted to just sit there and think about him and count down the seconds until I could see him again. I’d never felt this way about anyone before.

What was this?

It couldn’t be that I was in love with him, right? Knowing what my limitations were, I couldn’t have let myself go that far, right?

No, I wasn’t in love. I couldn’t be in love, because I was a divination agent with control over my emotions. That was that.

I poured tea into the cup that Markos had given me and sat in the front room to wait for my first appointment of the day, Mr. Frederick Thornton, omega, thirty-five, and “looking for guidance on an upcoming job interview,” according to his session application form. A nice, easy read to start the day, and I was thankful to have something unrelated to romance that I could occupy my mind with. It’d be a good warm-up. Appropriate charms and crystals were all set up, glyphs were drawn, and I felt fresh and ready.

Mr. Thornton arrived on time for his reading, and I brought him into the back and spoke with him over cups of tea to get to know his situation and what kind of person he was. He sat quietly, answering when asked but otherwise keeping silent, his eyes wandering around the room. I lit incense and candles, had him shift, and then took my position across from him. As I closed my eyes, my mind went to Markos. I wanted to take him to the spectral realm again and feel him put his—

No, no, I thought, and waved the thought away like it was a cloud of smoke. Don’t think about that. Concentrate on what you’re here to do.

I folded my hands in my lap and closed my eyes, letting my mind go blank, and out of the blackness, I could slowly see the golden light of the spectral flow. This whole process was as familiar to me as breathing. Easy, no problem.

Moving into the light, I channeled my focus to Mr. Thornton’s energy and easily found his constellation of spectral starlight. But when I tried to peer into it, I found myself standing at an invisible wall. I pushed forward, but couldn’t move. I was wading through a black, shimmering ocean towards a vision that kept on getting smaller the harder I tried to meet it.

Soon, I was struggling to even stay present in the spectral realm. I could feel myself being tugged back to reality, and it took everything I had to hold on. Then, I finally slipped.

I opened my eyes and inhaled a sharp, cold breath. Mr. Thornton opened his eyes, and I sat staring at the blank divination paper in front of me. This was exactly like last night.

“Um…” I touched my glasses, then pulled them off and rubbed my face with the back of my wrist. Mr. Thornton looked at me expectantly, waiting for my assessment. I cleared my throat. “Well, it seems like perhaps something is out of alignment today,” I said quickly. “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t able to make a reading. It, um, it happens sometimes, when the spectral realm isn’t accessible.”

This had never happened to me before yesterday.

I stood up. “I’ll refund your money for the reading.”

“B-but my interview is tomorrow,” Mr. Thornton said, shifting back to human form. “I needed this today.”

“I’m so sorry,” I said, and I walked him to the front. I quickly withdrew his refund from my lockbox. I was just in a hurry to get him out.

When he’d left, I went back to the divination chamber, cleared away the burnt candles and incense, and erased the glyphs from the floor. My heart was beating so fast I felt dizzy. I was afraid. What was happening? Another fluke?

Was I just not concentrating right? Was I thinking too much about Markos?

Or… had I messed up? Had I broken my vow? Was my abstinence the entire reason for my abilities?

Had I lost the ability to