Learning to Trust - M.A. Innes Page 0,43

bed, I paced around the room, then through the rest of the apartment when that wasn’t enough space.

I was grateful that Morgan was a sound sleeper as I got a drink of water in the kitchen. Leaning against the counter, I looked toward the bathroom and tried to imagine bathing him. No matter what Destin tried to imply, I wasn’t unreasonably squeamish about bodily functions, but I’d never thought about washing another adult.

The closest I’d ever come was when I’d volunteered at a retirement facility to have something else for my college applications. It hadn’t been exactly what I was expecting, but I hadn’t minded helping someone out.

I had a feeling this wasn’t going to be anything like that.

My image of what Morgan would look like naked was fuzzy because he’d never even walked around the apartment in just underwear, unlike some roommates I could name. The general idea was easy to picture as long as I kept him seated in the tub in my imagination, so I went with that.

Bubbles.

He’d probably like bubbles and toys to play with. That would go a long way in letting him maintain some privacy as I cleaned him. Leaving that part unwashed didn’t seem to be in the spirit of the activity, but by the time I got to that part of his anatomy it would have to seem more natural…right?

There had to be a way of researching it that didn’t require copious amounts of erotica.

Heading back to my room, I sat down on the bed and started researching again. It was really my damned imagination’s fault. Dreams were odd creatures that we shouldn’t have to remember. No matter how many times I told my awake self that Morgan wasn’t going to leave just because I wasn’t emotive enough, the fear was still there.

Another hour and countless odd search terms later, I found something interesting. A Daddy Dom group. The online social media group seemed to be composed of caretaker dominants of various ages and in different types of relationships.

After filling out several questions and applying to the group, I was approved in minutes. The group rules were fairly typical, reminding new members about privacy and not being a dick. Both of which I approved wholeheartedly.

Any hesitation I felt about joining the group faded as I saw questions I could relate to and logical answers by different members. The questions ranged from emotionally based ones to the utterly practical. There were even detailed posts by what seemed to be long-term members about their lives and how their relationships worked.

Yes, there were off-color jokes and a variety of pictures I wouldn’t have posted, but the information was worth it. Just seeing other dominants in similar situations had me relaxing and reading through older posts.

Several times a gentleman whose screen name was AceDaddio responded to posts that were about the nonsexual side of intimate interactions. After seeing a notification that made it clear he was online, I decided to contact him.

BoredCollegeGuy: I have a few questions about incorporating intimacy into a Daddy boy relationship if you wouldn’t mind discussing it.

After a few moments, his response popped up.

AceDaddio: No problem. What’s on your mind?

Even without pseudonyms, I would have laid out my situation. I wasn’t ashamed of not dating or my questions, no matter what Destin seemed to worry about.

BoredCollegeGuy: I’m in a relationship with a little and while I’m getting a handle on a lot of the things he needs, we’re not in a sexual relationship. Your comments make it clear that while you’re asexual, you still enjoy some of the more intimate types of touching with your little. Would it be inappropriate to ask how that goes together for you? I’m still trying to figure out how I see sexual relationships and I don’t know how to define myself just yet.

So it was slightly rambly and a bit long for an online discussion…but as I waited for him to respond, not sure what I would have changed, I decided not to worry about how eloquent I sounded.

After a minute or so, his response came on the screen.

AceDaddio: Not inappropriate, that’s why I try to comment when I can. Most people see BDSM in general as very sexually focused when it doesn’t have to be. For me, and I can only tell you about how I see it, I like watching my partners enjoy themselves. I like seeing my boy come apart in my arms and know that I’m giving him that enjoyment. So while