"You're going to lose control."
"I think so," I said.
"Anita . . ."
"Go, now, Edward, please, just go." I was worried about my friend, but my eyes were all for the man in front of me. I stared up into those gray eyes and knew now that it was the color of his tiger. This close I could see the differences between human eyes and the tiger's in his face. His arms had slid around me, drawing me in against his body; my arms were already around his waist.
"You want me?" He sounded surprised.
"Yes," I said, and four different tigers began to trot up the long dark space inside me. I buried my face against his T-shirt and the chest underneath. He smelled like hot, red flame and the air after a lightning storm when it's clean and fresh, and under that was candy. He smelled like cotton candy, sugary, sweet, something that would melt on your tongue. I'd found that all the gold tigers smelled like something sweet to me, under the sweet smell of candy was another sweet scent. Clover—white clover on a hot summer's day—was what his blue tiger smelled like. Cynric at home smelled like a whole garden in high summer, so apparently blue tigers smelled like green, growing things. Four of my tigers stared up at me, their lips drawn back, to take in the scent of his skin, as deeply as we could breathe it in. They gave a chorus of growling purrs that rumbled up through my body as if my bones were a tuning fork for the beginning of some deep, bass song. It made my knees go weak. Ethan caught me, which pushed our bodies that last inch together. I could feel that his body was hard and eager already. The sensation of it drew a small noise from me. "Yes, I want you." And the ardeur rose up in me like a wave, but this time the tigers inside me weren't fighting it; their power mingled with the ardeur, and I realized something I hadn't before. I had some of the same power as the old Master of Tigers, but the ardeur had turned it into something else, something warmer, kinder, more alive. That aliveness spilled up my skin and over his, so that he cried out, wordless, eyes closing, back bowing, arms tightening around me to simply keep him standing.
"So much power," he whispered.
I had a moment to wonder if this was just the ardeur feeding, or if I would accidentally bind him to me metaphysically. I didn't need more men in my life, not permanently. The thought helped me push the ardeur away, just a little, so I could have another thought. Ethan didn't deserve to be bound to me forever, not by accident. I didn't want to take his free will. I didn't want to trap him, or me.
I was able to climb back into the driver's seat of my own head. Ethan stared down at me. "What's wrong? The power's fading."
"Something is wrong with this feeding, Ethan. It's different."
"What?"
"There's a chance that it won't just be the ardeur. That I'll bind you to me as my tiger to call."
"Like Alex?" he asked.
I nodded, staring up at him, searching his face. He was handsome in a guy sort of way, cheekbones high, but thin-faced, so the shape was a soft rectangle. He had a dimple in his chin.
"Alex still has his life, his job; you haven't hurt him."