The Last Eligible Bachelor - Ashtyn Newbold Page 0,72

the end would be the hardest thing of all.

Chapter 21

My efforts to avoid Mr. Hill were less obvious than my past efforts to flirt with him and imitate Miss Downsfield. I was subtle, careful, and sneaky. Although he invited me for a ride each morning, I made sure to speak less and ride faster, so as to avoid any flirting and teasing which might have occurred. I invited a chaperone each time as well, as there was nothing that hindered flirtation like Mrs. Ollerton on our heels. We couldn’t speak of private matters, and we couldn’t be improper in the slightest.

Mr. Hill was not a fool—he recognized the change in me—but I never gave him the opportunity to question it. Thankfully, Mrs. Ollerton had several activities planned for the last fortnight of our stay, and I made sure to engage one of the ladies in conversation on each group outing, and Mr. Hill’s arm was always eagerly claimed by someone else.

I had written out the days on a sheet of foolscap in my room, penciling an X through each day that passed, bringing me closer to the end of my charade. I had thought my distance from Mr. Hill would make me care for him less, but the effect was the opposite of what I had intended. I missed him. And I hadn’t laughed since the night we sneaked the necklace back to the drawing room. Mrs. Ollerton had been shocked the next morning to find it returned to its proper place, and had attributed the entire ordeal to a miracle.

Mrs. Ollerton, much like all the other ladies, seemed to have noticed the distance I was putting between myself and Mr. Hill. It made them all much more civil toward me. Even as hard as I tried not to feel it, guilt pooled in my stomach at the confusion on Mr. Hill’s face each time I turned away from him or avoided his gaze. During the more idle times of each day, I moved from place to place within the house, making my way secretly down to Jessie’s room where he could not find me.

All of my efforts would have to be stopped eventually though, when I gathered the courage to ask about his uncle and my father. But by then I would be closer to my departure and I would never have to see him again. The pain would lessen, this entire month would become a memory, and I would return to Sedgwick Manor without having failed completely. And with luck, Papa might be free. There was no cost too great for that. Not even my heart. Not even Mr. Hill’s.

Tears burned behind my eyes as I walked up the stairs from Jessie’s room. I blinked them away, listening to the quiet prattle drifting through the air from the sitting room. In the last week, I had formed the habit of tucking myself away in the farthest corner of the library most afternoons. From the doorway, I couldn’t be seen in my hiding place.

The tricky part was getting there without being caught, but I was well-practiced.

With quick steps, I hurried past the partially open door of the sitting room, holding my skirts up to avoid excess rustling against the floor. When I was out of sight, I slowed my steps, trying to envision the shelves and which book I would select from among the many I had already finished.

When I opened the library door, I stopped, my legs rigid.

“Oh, forgive me, Mr. Hill,” I stammered when he glanced up at me from the table at the center of the room. Afternoon light filled the library, and my favorite place to read was tucked in a ray of sun near the window, tucked behind the farthest shelf. I couldn’t simply go to it now. A second ray of sunlight fell upon Mr. Hill’s broad shoulders, bringing out lighter tones in his hair and eyes.

“So this is where you have been disappearing every afternoon, is it?” He set down the book he had been holding, coming to his feet.

“Most afternoons.” I shifted awkwardly, pressing my lips together. We had hardly spoken since the night we sneaked through the house, and it showed in the hurt that shone behind his eyes. Didn’t he see it was for the best? His convictions about marriage might have been just that: convictions. He could change them if he wished, but I couldn’t do anything about the fact that I was a maid in disguise. He