ignoring the elephant in the room, but that needs to stop.”
She knew what he was saying and yet she wasn’t so sure she was ready to rip this particular bandage off. Things had been so wonderful and she feared bringing up the past was going to ruin it.
“Believe it or not, Syd, I always regretted the way things ended with us. I was such a damn jerk and I hate that I hurt you. But I never forgot you…never stopped thinking of you…never got over you.” He closed the distance between them again. “I was immature and selfish and...I’m sorry.”
It was crazy how much his admission meant to her. It was so long ago and if anyone had asked her before she came back to Magnolia Sound if she were over him, she definitely would have said yes. But...she wasn’t. She never had. And knowing he felt the same way meant the world to her.
“Thank you,” she said quietly as her head rested on his chest. With a steadying breath, she forced herself to look up at him. “Although, to be fair, I wasn’t completely blameless either.”
“Syd…”
“I was just as immature and selfish as you were, Kyle. I had plans and knew that I wanted to go away to school and nothing was going to stop me. It wasn’t fair of me to expect you to just be sitting here waiting around for me or to suggest you should uproot your life and follow me to school.”
They stood there in silence and she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
“College was never my thing,” he said after a moment. “And, to be honest, it was a little intimidating listening to you talk about it.” Stepping away, he turned and sat down on the couch. “I always knew I was good at working with my hands. I can take a car engine apart and put it back together and I can even build a house. But sitting in a classroom?” He let out a mirthless laugh. “That was pure torture for me.”
Silently, she sat beside him.
Kyle’s gaze was a little sad, a little helpless. “I guess I knew I wasn’t good enough for you and I lashed out and behaved like a total jerk.”
This was a side of him she didn’t know and she wasn’t sure how to respond.
He reached out and took one of her hands in his. “The thing is, Syd, I don’t want to keep looking back. I like what we have right now and I’d really like to see where it goes. I just…” He paused and seemed to consider his words. “I just thought it was time that I owned up to what I did to us.”
Wow.
“You have no idea how much this means to me. I wish I had known back then what you were thinking. I don’t know if it would have changed anything—I mean, I was still going to go away for college—but maybe things would have been a little less hostile when I left.”
He nodded.
It would be easy for this conversation to completely ruin the light mood of just a few minutes ago and she knew she needed to get them back on track. “But, like you, I don’t want to keep looking back. I need to stay fully grounded in the present and keep looking ahead.” She let out a soft sigh. “My life is very complicated right now, Kyle, even without factoring you and me into the equation.”
Another nod. “I know.”
“And if this is going to go somewhere, then we need to communicate,” she said firmly, squeezing his hand. “There are going to be times when I can’t just get up and go or leave Haley so we can go out.”
“I haven’t asked that of you before today, Syd,” he gently reminded her. “I know how fragile things are for the two of you right now. Honestly, I’ve enjoyed all the times the three of us have gone out.” Then he gave her that boyish grin. “But I’m just a man. And you are one hell of a sexy woman. There are going to be times when I need to be alone with you and have a date where it’s just the two of us or even with other couples.”
“That does sound good…”
“So, can we agree to try to make some of these things happen?” he asked, his expression hopeful.
“Definitely.”
It wasn’t the least bit surprising when he cupped her face in those large, magnificent hands and kissed