Lamb The Gospel According to Biff Christs Childho - By Christopher Moore Page 0,32

Raziel, a play. It's not real, get it?"

"No."

And he didn't. I've learned that there's a tradition in this time of telling funny stories about the stupidity of people with yellow hair. Guess where that started.

I think that we all expected everything to go back to normal after the killer was found, but it seemed that the Romans were much more concerned with the extermination of the Sicarii then they were with a single resurrection. To be fair, I have to say that resurrections weren't that uncommon in those days. As I mentioned, we Jews were quick to get our dead into the ground, and with speed, there's bound to be errors. Occasionally some poor soul would fall unconscious during a fever and wake to find himself being wrapped in linen and prepared for the grave. But funerals were a nice way to get the family together, and there was always a fine meal afterward, so no one really complained, except perhaps those people who didn't wake before they were buried, and if they complained - well, I'm sure God heard them. (It paid to be a light sleeper, in my time.) So, impressed as they might have been with the walking dead, the next day the Romans began to round up suspected conspirators. The men in Maggie's family were hauled off to Sepphoris at dawn.

No miracles would come to bring about the release of the prisoners, but neither were there any crucifixions announced in the days that followed. After two weeks had passed with no word of the fate or condition of the men, Maggie, her mother, her aunts, and her sisters went to the synagogue on the Sabbath and appealed to the Pharisees for help.

The next day, the Pharisees from Nazareth, Japhia, and Sepphoris appeared at the Roman garrison to appeal to Justus for the release of the prisoners. I don't know what they said, or what sort of leverage they could possibly have used to move the Romans, but the following day, just after dawn, the men of Maggie's family staggered back into our village, beaten, starving, and covered with filth, but very much alive.

There was no feast, no celebration for the return of the prisoners - we Jews walked softly for a few months to allow the Romans to settle down. Maggie seemed distant in the weeks that followed, and Josh and I never saw the smile that could make the breath catch in our throats. She seemed to be avoiding us, rushing out of the square whenever we saw her there, or on the Sabbath, staying so close to the women of her family that we couldn't talk to her. Finally, after a month had passed, with absolutely no regard for custom or common courtesy, Joshua insisted that we skip work and dragged me by the sleeve to Maggie's house. She was kneeling on the ground outside the door, grinding some barley with a millstone. We could see her mother moving around in the house and hear the sound of her father and older brother Simon (who was called Lazarus) working the forge next door. Maggie seemed to be lost in the rhythm of grinding the grain, so she didn't see us approach. Joshua put his hand on her shoulder, and without looking up, she smiled.

"You are supposed to be building a house in Sepphoris," she said.

"We thought it more important to visit a sick friend."

"And who would that be?"

"Who do you think?"

"I'm not sick. In fact, I've been healed by the touch of the Messiah."

"I think not," said Joshua.

She finally looked up at him and her smile evaporated. "I can't be friends with you two anymore," she said. "Things have changed."

"What, because your uncle was a Sicarii?" I said. "Don't be silly."

"No, because my mother made a bargain to get Iban to convince the other Pharisees to go to Sepphoris and plead for the men's lives."

"What kind of bargain?" Joshua asked.

"I am betrothed." She looked at the millstone again and a tear dripped into the powdered grain.

We were both stunned. Josh took his hand from her shoulder and stepped back, then looked at me as if there was something I could do. I felt as if I would start crying at any second myself. I managed to choke out, "Who to?"

"To Jakan," Maggie said with a sob.

"Iban's son? The creep? The bully?"

Maggie nodded. Joshua covered his mouth and ran a few steps away, then threw up. I was tempted to join him, but instead I