to reach him you’re willing to offer yourself to a man you don’t even like. And that I would call self-destructive.”
“Enemies with Benefits,” Meghan muttered to herself.
“Pardon?”
“Nothing. I’ll look for Thomas first. He told me he could see me in Sylvanne’s eyes, a ray of light through dark shutters. Unless I see the same glimmer in Derek’s eyes, unless I’m certain Thomas is there, and feel a connection to him, I won’t be able to go through with it.”
“You felt so guilty when Sylvanne suffered,” Anne reminded her. “What about Derek? He won’t be raped or violated as Sylvanne almost was, but in a similar way he will be used, even if he enters into it willingly.”
“Derek I don’t worry about,” Meghan said. “He’s a hedonist. On that level he’s going to love it.”
38
Derek was checking ashtrays for a cigarette butt long enough to smoke. He found one on the kitchen counter; out the window he caught a glimpse of Betsy on the steps of her deck next door. He went out to see her.
She was dressed nicely, for a party or family gathering, he thought. She’d tucked the hem of her skirt into her waistband, and was balancing on the unicycle, riding it back and forth a foot or two, but still keeping hold of the deck railing. “You’re getting it,” he said. “Next step is letting go. What’s with the duds? What’s the occasion?”
“Church.”
“Is it Sunday?”
“According to those who follow the Christian calendar, yes,” she replied, feeling very clever.
“Aha. You believe in God and all that, do you?”
“God created the world. If he didn’t, who did?”
“Well it wasn’t me, I’d have done a better job. You would’ve too. Just think what the world would be like if you could invent it from scratch.”
“There’d be no pollution, everywhere would be a park, and there’d be unicorns.”
“Perfect,” he replied. “I didn’t even know you went to church.”
“My mom says it’s important I learn the Bible so I’ll get all the referrals to it in books and art when I’m older.”
“Good thinking. Planning for tomorrow today, that’s your mother. Only problem is no one’s going to look at books and art by the time you’re twenty, it’ll all just be tweets about pop stars.”
Meghan came out. “C’mon Betsy, we’re late. We gotta go.”
“You’re late. I was ready.”
“Whatever. We are late.”
“No, not we, because you don’t even go to church.” Betsy said. She turned to Derek and added, “She just drops me at Sunday school and goes shopping.”
“Grocery shopping, not fun shopping,” Meghan clarified. “C’mon, move your butt.”
TEN MINUTES LATER DEREK was surprised to find Meghan at his door. “What’s up? What happened to shopping?” he asked.
“Shopping I can do with Betsy. This is the only hour I’ll get all day to do something for myself, so I figured I’d take a break from being Supermom. Can I come in?”
“Of course, of course.”
He led the way to his living room. Once there she didn’t sit down, so he didn’t either. She said, “I need to look into your eyes.”
He let her do it. Her gaze unsettled him. It was unwavering, piercing, probing. “Come closer,” she said. She continued to stare deeply and directly at him. They stood toe to toe, their faces mere inches apart. He had an urge to wrap his arms around her.
“Is this like a staring contest?”
“Shhh.”
After a moment Meghan said doubtfully, “I think I see him. Thomas, I know you’re in there, but it’s like you’re sitting in the back row of the theatre. I wish you’d come down front, where I can be sure it’s you.”
“Tell me—why exactly are you so in my face?” Derek asked.
“Thomas has taken your advice. He’s promised to stop talking to me when he talks to her. And he had something else to say. Before I tell you, don’t get any ideas that it’s going to happen.”
Derek lowered himself down and settled comfortably onto the couch, stretching out his jeans-clad legs. He said, “I think I like where this is going.”
“I wanted to connect with him, through Sylvanne. He wants to connect with me. Through you.”
Derek looked at her blankly for a moment, then suddenly crowed, “Jackpot!” His grin stretched nearly to his earlobes. “Thank you Thomas! Well then, what are we waiting for?” He patted the couch beside him. “Come on—let’s give his Lordship the ride of his life!”