It was because we fought all the time and he was right, I enjoyed it. It was challenging, he made me think, kept me on my toes. He wasn’t boring, staid and predictable. He didn’t let me walk all over him. He was honest and if something was on his mind he shared it even if it would anger me or he was calling me out on one of my many neuroses.
It was also because Max seemed not only to have patience with my many neuroses but most of the time he thought they were cute.
It was because he knew how I took my coffee, he held my hand, he kissed my forehead and he draped his arm along the back of the booth when we were sitting together.
It was Max telling Mindy she was loved; she just didn’t get how much.
It was because he was a good kisser and better in bed.
It was because he held me when we slept, like right then, his arm under my body, wrapped around me, holding me to his side as if, even in sleep, he had no intention of ever letting me go.
Even with all that, I knew I would never be the love of Max’s life. I knew someplace deep he’d already had that and in that deep place it also hurt knowing I’d never be that for him. If it worked out with us, I wouldn’t ever be the love of anyone’s life. But that wasn’t what bothered me. It was that I wouldn’t be that person for Max. Especially Max.
But I also knew it had taken him ten years to find someone he’d like to explore sharing his life with again. And he’d made it clear that someone was me.
So I would never be what Mom was to Steve.
But being Max’s second chance at something good was better than anything else I’d ever experienced. Nothing else even came close.
If I gave it a chance it would be settling, definitely.
But I decided, pressed to Max’s side, in his bed, in his A-Frame in the Colorado Mountains, after living the craziest week of my life and going through what we went through yesterday and still waking feeling rested and safe, I could settle for that.
Sweetheart, you’re selling yourself short, Charlie warned in my head.
Go away, I replied and shifted up, my decision made which might be stupid, insane and irrational, but I no longer had it in me to care. I put my mouth to Max’s amazing chest and I trailed it down to his nipple. Once there, I flicked it with my tongue.
Max’s fingers slid in my hair and I heard a drowsy-husky-gravelly, “Honey.”
I’d forgotten about that so I added it to my list. It was also the fact that Max called me “honey”, “baby”, “darlin’” and “babe”.
Not to mention his gravelly voice.
I didn’t lift my head when I heard him speak, just moved over him, straddling his body and adding my hands to my discovery.
I took my time and Max let me. Over to his other nipple where I played then down where I ran the tip of my tongue along the ridges of his belly. All the while my fingers moved along the contours of his chest, his sides then down to his hips.
I moved down too, my body and my mouth. He opened his legs for me and I positioned myself between them, curling small, I wrapped my hand around his hard shaft and swirled the silky tip with my tongue.
“Fuck, baby,” Max groaned, his fingers sliding back into my hair and fisting.
Encouraged, I swirled and swirled and swirled then opened my mouth over him and sucked him inside, as much as I could take and I liked every inch I could get.
Max’s fist twisted in my hair and he growled, “Fuck.”
I was guessing he liked it too.
Taking him deep, I decided I liked more than the taste of him, the feel of him in my mouth. I liked knowing how much he liked it so I slid him out and sucked him back in again and again and again.
Max’s other hand went into my hair and suddenly, when I slid him out, his h*ps surged up, filling my mouth so full, I nearly took all of him. Then he pulled out and surged back in again and again and again.
It was Max taking over, as usual, Max being domineering and it was delicious.
So delicious, I felt the tightness and wet of excitement gathering between my legs and I moaned against his shaft.
When I did, he pulled out of my mouth, his hands left my hair, they went under my arms and I was yanked up and over him. I didn’t get the chance to process this quick change of circumstances, he knifed to sitting and then before I knew it my t-shirt was gone. Then he rolled me to my back on the bed and my underwear was gone. Then he somehow maneuvered me so I was straddling his face but was facing his hips.
“Wrap your mouth back around me, Duchess,” he growled from between my legs before I had time to come to terms with my position which under normal circumstances this early in a sexual relationship might be a little daunting. But I felt the vibration of his words between my legs and I liked it a lot, enough to forget to feel daunted.