I opened and shut my mouth three times not knowing what to say.
“Don’t deny it.”
“How did you know?” I whispered.
“No one’s that f**kin’ tight. Jesus, Jules, why didn’t you say anything?”
“Turn off the faucet,” I said in an effort to stall. I did not want to have this particular conversation.
“Answer me,” he demanded. Vance was apparently intent on having this particular conversation.
I gave in to get it over with. “I tried, last night but things got…” I started then stopped, “and this morning things were advanced –”
“I didn’t use protection,” he interrupted me.
I blinked at him then my eyes got wide.
“Fuck.” The word was a gentle explosion under his breath and then he got further into my space, his face close to mine. “I didn’t expect it to go that far.”
This was not good.
“What did you expect to happen?” I asked.
“I expected to make you come with my hand and have time to get protection before I f**ked you. But Christ, your face when you came…”
He stopped speaking and I stopped breathing.
Then he went on. “I also expected you to be the kind of woman with enough experience and brains to keep herself protected.”
My mouth dropped open then I snapped it shut then I said, “You make it sound like my fault.”
“You didn’t tell me you were a virgin. Things would have gone differently if you had.”
I didn’t know what that meant and I didn’t get the chance to ask.
He kept talking. “How in the f**k does someone who looks like you remain a virgin until you’re twenty-six f**kin’ years old?”
Okay, so, I was getting the impression that my virginal status was a turn off. Instead of this making me angry, it hurt me someplace private, someplace there was no way in hell I’d ever let show.
I pretended his words didn’t affect me and looked for an excuse.
“I’ve been kinda busy,” I told him.
“That’s not it.”
“I’m a lesbian?” I tried.
He stared at me like he thought it might be a good idea to call a certain kind of doctor.
Then he twisted his torso around, turned off the faucet, came back and put his hands on the wall on either side of me.
“No one has ever touched you?” he asked, his voice still sounding angry, intense and I didn’t know how to react.
I mean, this wasn’t exactly the end of the world, was it?
Was I that bad?
“No one’s ever touched me,” I answered softly.