“What?” My voice was so low even I wondered if I’d made any noise.
Super Dude Luke’s superpowers included super-hearing. “He isn’t a good guy but he’s a good ally.”
I didn’t speak, couldn’t speak. I was trying to process. I was also trying to breathe. Both I was finding difficult.
“Daisy’s clean,” Luke told me.
“Does she know what he does?”
“I’m guessin’, yeah.”
“Then she can’t be clean.”
“She’s clean.”
“I think you and I may have different definitions of the word ‘clean’.”
All of a sudden he advanced. Even knowing I was a head crackin’ mamma jamma I retreated. I was vulnerable. I liked Daisy. I liked her a lot. I wanted to be her friend but more, I wanted her to be mine. I’d suffered a blow from which I didn’t know if I could recover.
Somehow Luke got me up against a wall and he came in close. This wasn’t predatory-I’m-going-to-kiss-you close, this was pay-attention-to-me close.
“People do what people do to get by or get ahead or leave shit lives behind. But there are lots of things that define them. How they act, the way they treat people they care about. Daisy lives well off dirty money. The minute she entered Indy’s life Lee investigated her and she’s had more bumps than most, enough for her to deserve to live well. She’s a good person and she isn’t involved in Marcus’s business. He’s got legitimate shit running alongside his other concerns. Both sides are lucrative. He used to work for whatever he got out of it. Now he works for her. There’s beauty in that and it isn’t for you to judge.”
“But –”
“Jules, it isn’t for you to judge.”
“I disagree.”
“You pull out of that gang you strike a blow to a good woman who’s taken to carin’ about you because you think you’re too good for her. What does that say about you?”
What he said gave me pause. Pizza, football and facials gave me pause. Daisy taking Clarice shopping and hanging out with her at King’s gave me pause.
“Shit,” I whispered and my eyes slid to the side, away from Luke.
His hand came to my neck, thumb at my jaw and my eyes slid back.
He wasn’t looking at me like he was swinging toward disappointed. Now his eyes were warm with approval and something else.
“Now that you worked that out, somethin’ else you should know,” he said.
Uh-oh.
“Luke –”
“Vance is a friend, has been for awhile. I like him. I respect him. He’s good at what he does and I know he has my back. He knows I have his.”
This, I thought, was good.
“I get the barest, f**kin’ inkling he’s f**kin’ you around, I’m there.”
This, I thought, was not good.
“I’m in love with him,” I blurted.
Now why did I say that? I hadn’t even told Vance that. I wasn’t even going to tell Vance that. Not until he told me. I wasn’t going to be out on the limb like Jet was with Eddie for months or for forever, worried about painting bathrooms purple or… whatever.
No way.