A few steps from the living room door I decided it was time. I had my opportunity so I stopped and turned to Lee.
“Can I talk to you a second?” I asked.
Lee and Indy stopped. Lee’s eyes came to me and he nodded.
Indy said, “I’ll just –”
My gaze swung to her and I interrupted, “No, it’s okay. You can stay. This won’t take long.”
Indy nodded but she took Lee’s hand and it looked like she was bracing. Lee just kept watching me.
Throughout dessert, I practiced what I was going to say so I was ready.
I took a deep breath, squared my shoulders, looked at Lee and said, “I’ve spent my life around bad people. Bad people that did things to hurt other people and they had no regrets.”
“Sadie –” Lee started.
“Please, hear me out.”
Lee stopped talking.
“It was hard, living in that world,” I told him.
He was silent. Indy was silent. I went on.
“It would be harder living in a world where a good person blamed himself for what a bad person did.” I paused then delivered my grand finale, what I thought was rather decisively (if I did say so myself), “You share no responsibility for what happened to me.”
Immediately Lee said, “I appreciate that but it doesn’t change the fact that I –”
I interrupted, “You hold onto this regret it’s going to…”
Now what did I say?
I didn’t expect Lee to do anything but feel off the hook. He was messing up my grand finale! I didn’t think to practice different responses to his possible responses! Why couldn’t he just agree and let it go so we could go have coffee?
This being nice to people was hard.
Oh well, I just had to make it up. “It’s going to be… ” I searched for a word. “Very um…” come on Sadie! “Upsetting,” I finished.
Both Indy and Lee were staring at me.
I was spent, I had no more but I didn’t feel it was appropriate to walk away.
Finally Lee grinned and said, “I wouldn’t want to upset you.”
His tone was bizarre. Then it hit me that he was teasing me.
Yes, teasing me.
The Ice Princess reared her head. “Well. Yes. See that it doesn’t happen.”
For some reason what I said made Lee burst out laughing. It made Indy do the same.
They laughed right in the face of the Ice Princess!
How bizarre was that?
Lee moved in (shattering my Ice Fortress, by the way), threw his arm around my shoulders and walked me into the living room, Indy following.